Nov 3, 2006

text messages 1051 - 1100

1051. I freaking love you. Today is bestfriend day. Send this to all your friends and me. If you get 7 back, you're loved.

1052. IMPORTANT NOTE: If you don't send this text to at least 5 people in the next 30 seconds, a bird will crap on you today.

1053. Hello, I am Cordelia. I died in a fire 10 years ago. Unless you send this message on to 10 other people, I will come to your room tonight and stare at you. I look like a three-year old - without a face. I will show up every night. You have seven minutes to send this.

1054. I saw something in the shop window today. It was stunning sexy, cute, beautiful and adorable. I was supposed to buy it for you till I realized it was my own REFLECTION.

1055. Those innocent eyes. Those kissable lips. A great smile. The perfect walk. Smoothest talk. Absolutely gorgeous. That's enough about me. How are you?

1056. Durex regrets to inform you that your birth was a mistake. Please report to the nearest hospital to be put down immediately. Sorry for any inconvenience.

1057. Roses are red, violets are blue, monkeys like you should be kept in the zoo. Don't get angry, you will find me there too,not in the cage but laughing at you.

1058. Nobody likes you. Nobody cares for you. Nobody misses you. Nobody wants to see you. Nobody is your best friend. Nobody is happy with you. Hey, Don't cry at all!!! My name is Nobody.

1059. A heartbreak is always a blessing from God. It might be a very worst nightmare that leaves you crying in the middle of the night. But it is just his way of letting you realized he saved you from the wrong one.

1060. In ancient England, people could not have sex unless they had consent of the king or unless they were in the royal family. When people wanted to have a baby, they had to get the consent of the king and the king have them a placard that they hung on their door while they were having sex. The placard had f.u.c.k. (fornication under consent of the king) on it. Hence, that's where the word f*ck came from. Aren't you glad you learned something new today?

1061. When you want to make a difference... subtract. Naks! Deep.

1062. A man once said: First, I was dying to finish my high school and start college... Then, I was dying to finish college and start working... Then, I was dying to marry and have children. And then, I was dying for my children to grow old enough so I could go back to work. But then, I was dying to retire. And now, I'm dying, and suddenly I realized, I forgot to live. Live today like there's no tomorrow. Get the most out of life, enjoy it.

1063. Before a new chapter begins, the old one has to end. Tell yourself that what has passed will never come back. Remember that there was a time when you could live without that thing or that person - nothing is irreplaceable, a habit is not a need... Closing cycles, not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance but simply because that no longer fits your life. Stop being who you were, and change into who you are. - Paulo Coehlo on Pragmatism

1064. If you love someone, you say it right then out loud or the moment just passes you by. - My Bestfriend's Wedding

1065. When you find that person you want to spend the rest of your life with, you want the rest of your life to begin right away. - When Harry Met Sally

1066. If two people are meant for each other, it doesn't mean that they are meant for each other now - Dawson's Creek

1067. The only feeling of loss is when you love someone more than you love yourself. - Goodwill Hunting

1068. Love not because you like that person, nor because you care. Love not because you know that you can't live without that person. Instead, just love, and forget about why. Good night!

1069. Being with someone doesn't guarantee happiness. It doesn't matter how long you've been alone, how long you've hoped, or how long you've waited. There's no such thing as a perfect love story. Hearthaches will always be a part of loving. But remember though not perfect, if that love is meant for you, it will stick with you till the end. No matter how tough it gets, no matter how long. Far from perfect but real.

1070. Save yourself the trouble with traffic and cemeteries. Do not visit your departed loved ones anymore. Instead, ask them to visit you. It's more personal and meaningful. Good night!

1071. Two dillema's that rattle my mind: How do I get rid of someone who won't go and how do I hang on to someone who won't stay. Sakit sa ulo!

1072. The saddest quote by the funniest man ever born on this planet: "I always like walking in the rain so no one can see me crying." - Charlie Chaplin.

1073. What's the hardest part in ending a relationship? Not the feeling of letting go, not the part of goodbye, but going through every damn day and having to remember it.

1074. God understands that we are not strong all the time. Sometimes, all we can do is rest on his arms as he takes us thru the journey of life. With Him, we are safe.

1075. Love and Friend are walking in a village. Love falls into a well. Why? Because Love is blind. Friend also jumps inside. Why? Because Friend will do anything for Love.



1076. A man was asked, "How can you believe in God when the world has many problems?" The man replied, "With all these problems, how can you possibly make it without God?"

1077. Walang pinipili ang pag-ibig, kahit mahirap ka pa o mayaman. Pero paano kung minahal ka ng isang mahirap at isang mayaman, sino ang pipiliin mo? The one who has everything or the one who has nothing but willing to give everything?

1078. Gusto ko sanang kasama ka, kasi, espesyal ka sa akin. Gusto ko sanang katabi ka, kasi, love kita. Gusto ko sanang yakapin ka, kasi, miss na kita. Pero gustuhin ko man lahat yun, hindi pwede kasi malayo ka.

1079. Kailangan pa ba kitang itext para maalala mo ako? Kailangan bang lagi akong nauunang magparamdam? Bakit ka ganyan? Wala kang load? Busy ka? Magpapapansin pa ba ako sa iyo para maramdaman mong nagtatampo na ako.

1080. Ang love, parang work. Mahirap pero masaya, maraming kakumpetensya, pero kinakaya. May dayoff at overtime, tapos, minsan, may bonus pa. Eh paano kung pagod ka na? Magreresign ka na lang ba??

1081. Do you have the looks? Do you have the charm? Let us see if you have what it takes to be the first Mr. and Ms. Undas 2006. Sali ka na, dali!

1082. Inday.... will always love you!

1083. Kagabi, nanaginip ako. Pumangit daw lahat ng hindi nagtetext. Naisip kita! Natakot ako! Text ka nga kung cute ka pa!

1084. Simoy ng Pasko'y narito na. Merry.... galo ka na ba sa akin? Hehehe. Nagpapaalala lang, October na kasi eh.

1085. Russian: We are first on space! USA: We are first on the moon! Philippines: We will be the first in the sun! USA: You can't go there, you'll burn. Philippines: We are not stupid, we will go there at night!

1086. Doctor: Iho, bakit mo naman sinapak yung lalaki kanina? Boy: E doc, nakita nya nang ninenerbyos ako sa resulta ng AIDS test, tapos, sasabihin pa nya, think positive pare!

1087. When the time comes you feel emptiness, just sing this song... Boom tarat tarat! Boom tarat tarat! Tararat! Tararat! Boom! Boom! Boom!

1088. Announcing a new technological breakthrough of the new millenium: A new napkin designed to satisfy every woman's secret fantasy. Introducing... Whisper with tongue!

1089. As proposed by GMA, sex will now be taxed. Upon penetration, VAT - Vaginal Access Tax. If more than 10 minutes inside - Burial Tax. Upon withdrawal - Exit Tax. Those who don't have sex life, 10% Asset Tax. Those who practice withdrawal method with control - Withholding Tax. Entering other than wife - Road Users Tax. Multiple ejection - Multiple Taxation. Kung matuloy ito, sa iyo pa lang, makakaahon na ang Pilipinas sa lahat ng utang. =)

1090. Research said that men are healthier than women because men get fresh milk, 2 papayas and a juicy oyster every night but women only get 1 banana, 2 meatballs and a teaspoon of yogurt.

1091. Patient: Doc, I regularly move my bowel every morning at 7! Doc: What is wrong with that? Patient: Kasi, I wake up at 8:00 AM!

1092. Oy, may nalaman ako sa tungkol sa iyo. Ikaw talaga. Nakabalot ka na daw ng regalo para sa akin this Christmas! Thanks! Ang sweet naman!

1093. Pedro: Ang tapang talaga ni Paeng! Biro mo, tumalon sa eroplano nang walang parachute! Leo: Ohh, totoo? Saan mo naman nabalitaan yan? Pedro: Dun sa burol nya!

1094. Lola: Ikulong nyo ang asawa ko, kasi, puro dogstyle ang gusto nya! Pulis: Lola, wala pong illegal sa dogstyle. Lola: Pero inaamoy lang nya, tapos, iihian!

1095. Sayang si pare. Ang tatay, summa cum laude sa Ateneo. Ang nanay, summa cum laude sa UP. Ang kapatid, summa cum laude sa DLSU. Ang asawa, summa ma sa iba!

1096. Dear Chikito, Pinagsisisihan ko talaga ang pagbasted ko sa iyo. Tinetesting ko lang ang pasensya mo nung sabihin kong sobrang pangit mo, wala kang kwenta at isinumpa kang nilalang. Bawat segundo, ikaw ang nasa isip ko. Kahit sa panaginip, andun ka pa rin. Tanggap na tanggap ka ng mga magulang ko at mahilig lang talaga silang magbiro nung hinabol ka ng itak ng tatay ko at sinabuyan ka ng ihi ng nanay ko. Hindi talaga ako mabubuhay ng wala ka sa akin. Nagmamahal, Bianca. P.S. Congrats sa pagkapanalo mo sa lotto!

1097. Maraming bagay ang gumugulo sa isip ko. Bukod sa trabaho, pamilya, pag-ibig, barkada, pera, ang mas gumugulo sa utak ko ay, kung ano talaga ang tagalog sa shampoo?

1098. Trivia: Did you know that in Malaysia, the word ARAW refers to the person's sex organ? Wala lang, share ko lang. Anyway, sana, maligaya ang ARAW mo ngayon!

1099. Please call I'm at home... Please call I'm at work... Please call... I'm in a meeting, call me later at... Meeting is cancelled... I am late... I will be there at... See you in... See you at... Sorry, I can't help you on this... I will be arriving at... Mga templates. Sayang naman, hindi nagagamit. =)

1100. Let's congratulate Manny and Jinky Pacquiao for their baby girl. They'll name their baby after the combination of their names. Manny + Jinky = Manky. =)

Contributors:
1051-1058: John Ervin
1059: Lojik
1060-1073, 1098-1100: Erica
1074: Anonymous (+63918613***0)
1075-1076, 1081-1082: Arnel
1077-1080: Anonymous (+63920240***0)
1083: Anonymous (+63928785***6)
1084-1087: Irish
1088-1097: Abet (+63917866***0)

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