Hello guys!! Here's another batch of text messages. from inspirational text messages, romantic love quotes, funny text messages to pinoy text jokes. I'll be posting next time more text messages that you can share with your family and friends.
Inspirational Text Messages
3876. Every bad situation will have something positive. Even a dead clock shows correct time twice a day. Stay positive... God knows what's best for us. Have a happy morning!! =)
3877. Only in God we are truly safe and secure. Anything else is false security, whether you are surrounded by mighty walls of stone, a comfortable home or a secure job. No one can predict what tomorrow may bring. Our relationship with God is the only security that cannot be taken away. God Bless!!
3878. Like birds, let's leave behind what we don't need to carry...Grudges, sadness, pain, fear and regrets! Fly light... Life is beautiful! Good Morning!!
3879. Don't run ahead of God. Let Him direct your steps. He has plans and He has time. God's clock is never early nor late... it always strikes on time.
3880. Don't count what you lost, cherish what you have and plan what to gain, because past never returns, but the future may fulfill the loss. =)
Showing posts with label funny quotes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny quotes. Show all posts
Sep 25, 2009
Sep 15, 2009
text messages 3841-3875
3841. A short "hello" makes ONE glow; a short "hi" makes ONE smile; a short "text" makes a day great; but a short "prayer" 4 you will make your day safe! Good morning!!!
3842. Little trials without God can break you. Big trials with Him can make you great. May you always find strength in God's faithful providence. Good morning!!!
3843. Hear with your heart. See with your soul. Be guided by a hand that you can't hold. Trust even if you can't see. That's what faith must be! God bless! Good morning!!!
3844. Good morning. A new day has come for us to celebrate the challenges of life and to share with the less fortunate the blessings we receive. Have a magical day.
3845. POINTS TO PONDER:
*Brain cells come & go, but fat cells live forever.
*Age doesn't always bring wisdom, sometimes it comes alone.
*Life not only begins at 40, it also begins to show.
*The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave the unsaid wrong thing at the tempting moment.
*Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you'll just sit there.
*Today will be yesterday in just 24 hours...TGIF :-) TAKE CARE! :-)
3842. Little trials without God can break you. Big trials with Him can make you great. May you always find strength in God's faithful providence. Good morning!!!
3843. Hear with your heart. See with your soul. Be guided by a hand that you can't hold. Trust even if you can't see. That's what faith must be! God bless! Good morning!!!
3844. Good morning. A new day has come for us to celebrate the challenges of life and to share with the less fortunate the blessings we receive. Have a magical day.
3845. POINTS TO PONDER:
*Brain cells come & go, but fat cells live forever.
*Age doesn't always bring wisdom, sometimes it comes alone.
*Life not only begins at 40, it also begins to show.
*The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave the unsaid wrong thing at the tempting moment.
*Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you'll just sit there.
*Today will be yesterday in just 24 hours...TGIF :-) TAKE CARE! :-)
Apr 1, 2009
text messages 3816 - 3840
3816. A nice thought: You've got to accept a little sorrow in life. You'll never really know what happiness is, unless you have something to compare it to. :)
3817. How was it to be unnoticed by the person you notice most?...it's as if you were offering your most beautiful portrait to a blind person.
3818. "Not everything that makes us happy is right..but for sure, there will come a time when everything that is right,will make us happy"..
3819. Like the rain can't be stopped from falling, God's love and blessing keep on pouring, I hope you woke up renewed, refreshed and comfort of his company. Good Morning. Have a nice day ahead!:)
3820. Life has great options,you don't always have to pick what seems best...sometimes,the best & the perfect aren't always what makes you happy...you may have chosen what seems to be a wrong decisi0n or caught in a not so good situation but at times,it is through them that our lives become better. :)
3817. How was it to be unnoticed by the person you notice most?...it's as if you were offering your most beautiful portrait to a blind person.
3818. "Not everything that makes us happy is right..but for sure, there will come a time when everything that is right,will make us happy"..
3819. Like the rain can't be stopped from falling, God's love and blessing keep on pouring, I hope you woke up renewed, refreshed and comfort of his company. Good Morning. Have a nice day ahead!:)
3820. Life has great options,you don't always have to pick what seems best...sometimes,the best & the perfect aren't always what makes you happy...you may have chosen what seems to be a wrong decisi0n or caught in a not so good situation but at times,it is through them that our lives become better. :)
Nov 25, 2008
text messages 3616-3630
3616. Life can give you a hundred reasons to cry, but you can give life a thousand reasons to smile. Happy Thanksgiving!!Good Evening!
3617. A fish would never be happy living on land because it was made for water. You will never feel completely satisfied on earth because you were made for heaven! Rev 21:1 - Be happy! Happy Thanksgiving!
3618. One of my biggest rewards is to see your smile and to know that you are happy. I know life is sometimes going BAD but that is why I'm here for you to show that life can be good when somebody cares. Happy thanksgiving!!
3619. The most humbling statement we can say is "I am nothing without GOD" and our most powerful statement is "with God I can do anything" Happy Thanksgiving!! Good evening!
3620. A true friend defines the real meaning of friendship "it isn't based on how many secrets you share,isn't how well you get along nor how much you like each other, isn't how people see you together.. But it appreciates the differences, the gaps, the hindrances, the trials and still a friend looks at you, straight from the heart...without hatred, without judgement, without envy, without criticisms, only pure acceptance and respect. Good Morning!!
3617. A fish would never be happy living on land because it was made for water. You will never feel completely satisfied on earth because you were made for heaven! Rev 21:1 - Be happy! Happy Thanksgiving!
3618. One of my biggest rewards is to see your smile and to know that you are happy. I know life is sometimes going BAD but that is why I'm here for you to show that life can be good when somebody cares. Happy thanksgiving!!
3619. The most humbling statement we can say is "I am nothing without GOD" and our most powerful statement is "with God I can do anything" Happy Thanksgiving!! Good evening!
3620. A true friend defines the real meaning of friendship "it isn't based on how many secrets you share,isn't how well you get along nor how much you like each other, isn't how people see you together.. But it appreciates the differences, the gaps, the hindrances, the trials and still a friend looks at you, straight from the heart...without hatred, without judgement, without envy, without criticisms, only pure acceptance and respect. Good Morning!!
Nov 8, 2008
text messages 3596-3615
3596. A candle is a lovely thing. It makes no noise at all but quietly and unselfishly gives itself away with a flame of kindness…just like you! Good Evening!!!
3597. Life may lead us to different roads, meeting new people and learning new things. But one thing is for sure I will never forget the road where I met you! God Bless! =)
3598. No one in this world can dictate to you where you can be happy. If you know where and what it is…go for it. Just remember: Happiness is not a destiny, it’s a choice. Good Morning!!!
3599. I believe everything happens for a reason. People change so that you learn to let go. Things go wrong so that you learn to appreciate them when they are right. You believe less so eventually you trust no one but yourself. And sometimes, good things fall apart co better things can fall together. – Marlyn Monroe
3600. Never let go of anyone that you couldn’t go a day without thinking about. There just might be a very good reason why they’re always on your mind. Sometimes it’s the brain that knows too well what the heart tries so hard to deny.
3597. Life may lead us to different roads, meeting new people and learning new things. But one thing is for sure I will never forget the road where I met you! God Bless! =)
3598. No one in this world can dictate to you where you can be happy. If you know where and what it is…go for it. Just remember: Happiness is not a destiny, it’s a choice. Good Morning!!!
3599. I believe everything happens for a reason. People change so that you learn to let go. Things go wrong so that you learn to appreciate them when they are right. You believe less so eventually you trust no one but yourself. And sometimes, good things fall apart co better things can fall together. – Marlyn Monroe
3600. Never let go of anyone that you couldn’t go a day without thinking about. There just might be a very good reason why they’re always on your mind. Sometimes it’s the brain that knows too well what the heart tries so hard to deny.
May 20, 2008
text messages 3401 - 3450
3401. Life is an undying cycle. It is a battle of survival. If you quit, then you're a loser. If you fall, then stand up. If you keep on complaining about the miseries of your life, nothing will happen. God doesn't throw stones that we cannot catch. Live with Him and everything will turn out right. Good evening!
3402. Nothing makes a new day more promising than having the right heart, the right spirit, the right mind, and the right strength that comes from God.
3403. Tell God all your 3 P's: Problems, Pressures and Plans and He will give you His ABC's. Answers to prayers, Best favors and Courage to go on.
3404. Life is more meaningful if you have plenty of CASH. Christ Assurance of Salvation and Holiness. May you never run out of CASH for the rest of your life. :)
3405. The Bible says, "God will never give you a burden you can't bear." So, when you have a problem you think it's impossible to fix, take it as a compliment. God knows you can. Good night!
3406. Let me share this beautiful text: I asked God, "How do I get the best out of life?" God answered, "Face your past without regret, handle your present with confidence, prepare for the future without fear." Then He added, "Keep the faith and drop the fear. Don't believe your doubts and don't doubt your beliefs. Life is wonderful if you know how to live."
3407. To start a day is just like painting: Draw the lines with prayers, erase the errors with forgiveness, dip the brush with lots of patience, and color it with love. Good morning!
3408. Evening comes to pack up all the events of the day. Leave your worries behind and rest your body and mind. Let love be in your heart so you can sleep well tonight. Good night!
3409. Life has great options, but you don't always have to pick what seems to be the best. Sometimes, the best and perfect aren't always what makes you happy. Good day!
3410. Time and things don't really last. What matters are the people we care about and the values we dare to live and share. Let life be as beautiful as your heart.
3411. I used to think that I can wait. Wait till there's nothing left to wait for. But then I realized, I can wait till I forget the reason why I'm waiting.
3412. The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are.
3413. The best feeling in the world is realizing you're perfectly happy without the thing you thought you needed. Have a nice day ahead!
3414. If people have to leave us in one way or another, it would be best if they'll do it 100% lie-free and just slap the truth in our faces. We all do deserve something better than just lame excuses because lies in all sort do make us appear stupid.
3415. The best feeling in the world comes when you start feeling good again after feeling awful for a long time.
3416. If everything happened when and how we wanted it to, nothing in this world would ever be worth waiting for. There's a time for everything. God bless.
3417. When someone breaks your heart, you turn into a small ball of self-pity. You lie on bed, you hug your knees and keep them close like a fetus. Freud said: "It's human instinct to go back to the womb where we can feel safe."
3418. No one is born happy, but all of us are born with the ability to create happiness. Just remember, happiness is a state of mind and it depends on ones attitude towards life, not on what one has.
3419. Today, don't say any unkind words. Think of the people who can't speak. Don't complain about the food you eat, some have nothing. Don't complain about life, many die young. When you're tired of your job, think of the jobless, the disabled and those who wish they had yours. When sad thoughts seem to put you down, put a smile on your face, be positive and be thankful you're alive and still around. Life is a gift from God. Live it well. Good morning!
3420. A turtle once taught me that no matter how heavy his bearings are, it's his choice to carry the luggage for it is the only way he feels protected. Good morning!
3421. There are two kinds of worlds: the one you dream about and the real one. The challenge is not to choose but to make both worlds meet.
3422. Words from Ally McBeal: "If you wanna end up with the right person, you've got to make it happen. The best people are always taken. If you don't steal them, you won't have them."
3423. Did you know that most people assume that the summation of all the causes of hurt, pain and hatred in one word is just expectations?
3424. There were times I love to hate you. And then I love to love you. It's like I want to throw you off a cliff, then rush to the bottom to catch you.
3425. Somewhere in your heart, try to find a place for me. Somewhere in your heart, I don't care where it might be. One little corner may not mean so much to you but one little corner would be enough to see me through.
3426. As I lay down the cards in the game of solitaire. I see the king and queen of hearts side by side, I remember you and me and how you left me for the jack of hearts.
3427. I'd rather be with someone who loves me more than I love him. I'm 100% sure that my happiness is his priority, and no more sleepless nights.
3428. It's wrong to hurt those who love you, but it's worse to love those who hurt you.
3429. I began to make a step the moment I knew where I stand. Then I moved on.
3430. There's nothing enigmatic about why we fall in love with the wrong people. It's caused by the hormonal imbalances and chemical reactions in our system. Science can now explain it. - Discovery Channel.
3431. The heart is like a Rubik's cube, someone is supposed to mess the cube first so someone else could fit the colors perfectly.
3432. Sometimes, it's easier to act like you don't care than to admit that it's killing you.
3433. If you were to make the biggest decision in your life, would you rather be "Happy but wrong or sad but right?"
3434. It's just something that happens as we age up. We realize it's not important to have many friends, what's important is to have real ones.
3435. A friend is like a guitar. You have to keep tuning once in a while to keep the melody of friendship alive. Good evening!
3436. Hear with your heart. See with your soul. Be guided by a hand that you can't hold. Trust even if you can't see. That's what faith must be.
3437. True strength of character is not just calculated by how well we manage to carry a sizabl load under challenging conditions , but is perhaps better measured by our ability to remain kind and light spirited, even when we're sure that we can't bear the weight of one more ounce of life.
3438. Problemado ka ba at walang panggimik? Ito ang sagot dyan! Just text NANAY PENGE PERA at isend sa number nya! Ang dali, hindi ba? May chance ka pang mamura!
3439. Payabangan. Erni: Ang galing ng aso ko! Tuwing umaga, dala nya'ng dyaryo sa akin. Bert: Alam ko. Erni: Ha? Paano mo nalaman? Bert: Ikinikwento sa akin ng aso ko.
3440. There are times we treat life like a mysterious door. It doesn't open no matter how hard we push it! We never notice that a huge sign is posted there that reads, PULL.
3441. Slogans of famous presidents: Marcos: Mabuhay ang Filipino! Cory: Laban Filipino! Ramos: Sulong Filipino! Erap: Casino Filipino! GMA: Naloko ko ang Filipino!
3442. An airplane crashed at a town in Batangas: Media: Manong, pakilarawan po ng nangyari. Manong: Ala eh, nakow, garne ga utoy. Kakaalmusal ko laang. Gayak ako'y sisinsay sa kahanggan, ay natan-awan ko yaan sa alapaap ay nasisilaban. Bago sumirok ng papagay-on na akala mo'y papatak. Ginagaling na laang at sa sukalang are sumugba, ay kung sa kabayanan ga, ay di panay mga utas! Media: Ano daw??
3443. The secret of contentment is knowing how to enjoy what you have and be able to lose all the desire for things beyond your reach. Let's not be materialistic. Tama na yung magaganda at gwapong nilalang tayo.
3444. A playboy died. During a mass: Priest: He's an honest guy, good husband and family man. Wife: (whispered to her son) Anak, tingnan mo nga. Baka hindi na si papa mo yung nakaburol.
3445. Ang ingles ng nagpakamatay, suicide. Namatay sa bahay, homecide. Namatay sa inis, pesticide. Pinatay ng intsik. Intsikticide. Namatay sa ibabaw ng girl. In-sex-he-died.
3446. Waiting for someone you love isn't easy especially when while you're waiting, the one you are waiting for isn't aware that you are waiting. - Tongue twister yan, wag na mag-emote!
3447. Flash report: A thief broke into Malacanang. He stumbled into GMA and FG at the hall way. The first couple froze in silence. The thief panicked, ran away and screamed, "Magnanakaw!"
3448. Bruno: Tay, nasugatan ako! Tatay: Buti nga, hindi ka umiyak. Lalaki talaga ang anak ko! Bruno: Syempre naman po tay, sabi nga sa kani Fergie, "Big Girls Don't Cry."
3449. Think positive! Japanese archaeologist digging 100 meters down found copper wire, says, "Very good, our great ancestors of 1000 years already had telephone!" Americans dug 200 meters and found optical cable, says, "My God! This means our great forefathers already had broadband 2000 years ago!" Pinoy digs 500 meters and found nothing, says, "Ang lupit ng mga ninuno natin! Wireless!"
3450. Pulis: Bayad ko sa pancit. Tsino Himala, bakit ikaw bayad? Pulis: Utos ni chief. Bawal na ang kotong. Tsino: Ok, mula ngayon, baboy na lagay ko pancit mo, hindi na daga!
Contributors:
3401-3404, 3414-3419, 3423-3426, 3448-3450: Anonymous (+63910555***9)
3405, 3408-3413, 3431-3441: Asha (+63917898***7)
3406: Abet (+63917866***0)
3407: Noreen (+63919285***1)
3420-3421, 3443-3444: Anonymous (+63920801***3)
3422: Vahnrey (+63919227***5)
3427-3430, 3445-3447: Eroica
3442: Anonymous (+63906343***8)
3402. Nothing makes a new day more promising than having the right heart, the right spirit, the right mind, and the right strength that comes from God.
3403. Tell God all your 3 P's: Problems, Pressures and Plans and He will give you His ABC's. Answers to prayers, Best favors and Courage to go on.
3404. Life is more meaningful if you have plenty of CASH. Christ Assurance of Salvation and Holiness. May you never run out of CASH for the rest of your life. :)
3405. The Bible says, "God will never give you a burden you can't bear." So, when you have a problem you think it's impossible to fix, take it as a compliment. God knows you can. Good night!
3406. Let me share this beautiful text: I asked God, "How do I get the best out of life?" God answered, "Face your past without regret, handle your present with confidence, prepare for the future without fear." Then He added, "Keep the faith and drop the fear. Don't believe your doubts and don't doubt your beliefs. Life is wonderful if you know how to live."
3407. To start a day is just like painting: Draw the lines with prayers, erase the errors with forgiveness, dip the brush with lots of patience, and color it with love. Good morning!
3408. Evening comes to pack up all the events of the day. Leave your worries behind and rest your body and mind. Let love be in your heart so you can sleep well tonight. Good night!
3409. Life has great options, but you don't always have to pick what seems to be the best. Sometimes, the best and perfect aren't always what makes you happy. Good day!
3410. Time and things don't really last. What matters are the people we care about and the values we dare to live and share. Let life be as beautiful as your heart.
3411. I used to think that I can wait. Wait till there's nothing left to wait for. But then I realized, I can wait till I forget the reason why I'm waiting.
3412. The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are.
3413. The best feeling in the world is realizing you're perfectly happy without the thing you thought you needed. Have a nice day ahead!
3414. If people have to leave us in one way or another, it would be best if they'll do it 100% lie-free and just slap the truth in our faces. We all do deserve something better than just lame excuses because lies in all sort do make us appear stupid.
3415. The best feeling in the world comes when you start feeling good again after feeling awful for a long time.
3416. If everything happened when and how we wanted it to, nothing in this world would ever be worth waiting for. There's a time for everything. God bless.
3417. When someone breaks your heart, you turn into a small ball of self-pity. You lie on bed, you hug your knees and keep them close like a fetus. Freud said: "It's human instinct to go back to the womb where we can feel safe."
3418. No one is born happy, but all of us are born with the ability to create happiness. Just remember, happiness is a state of mind and it depends on ones attitude towards life, not on what one has.
3419. Today, don't say any unkind words. Think of the people who can't speak. Don't complain about the food you eat, some have nothing. Don't complain about life, many die young. When you're tired of your job, think of the jobless, the disabled and those who wish they had yours. When sad thoughts seem to put you down, put a smile on your face, be positive and be thankful you're alive and still around. Life is a gift from God. Live it well. Good morning!
3420. A turtle once taught me that no matter how heavy his bearings are, it's his choice to carry the luggage for it is the only way he feels protected. Good morning!
3421. There are two kinds of worlds: the one you dream about and the real one. The challenge is not to choose but to make both worlds meet.
3422. Words from Ally McBeal: "If you wanna end up with the right person, you've got to make it happen. The best people are always taken. If you don't steal them, you won't have them."
3423. Did you know that most people assume that the summation of all the causes of hurt, pain and hatred in one word is just expectations?
3424. There were times I love to hate you. And then I love to love you. It's like I want to throw you off a cliff, then rush to the bottom to catch you.
3426. As I lay down the cards in the game of solitaire. I see the king and queen of hearts side by side, I remember you and me and how you left me for the jack of hearts.
3427. I'd rather be with someone who loves me more than I love him. I'm 100% sure that my happiness is his priority, and no more sleepless nights.
3428. It's wrong to hurt those who love you, but it's worse to love those who hurt you.
3429. I began to make a step the moment I knew where I stand. Then I moved on.
3430. There's nothing enigmatic about why we fall in love with the wrong people. It's caused by the hormonal imbalances and chemical reactions in our system. Science can now explain it. - Discovery Channel.
3431. The heart is like a Rubik's cube, someone is supposed to mess the cube first so someone else could fit the colors perfectly.
3432. Sometimes, it's easier to act like you don't care than to admit that it's killing you.
3433. If you were to make the biggest decision in your life, would you rather be "Happy but wrong or sad but right?"
3434. It's just something that happens as we age up. We realize it's not important to have many friends, what's important is to have real ones.
3435. A friend is like a guitar. You have to keep tuning once in a while to keep the melody of friendship alive. Good evening!
3436. Hear with your heart. See with your soul. Be guided by a hand that you can't hold. Trust even if you can't see. That's what faith must be.
3437. True strength of character is not just calculated by how well we manage to carry a sizabl load under challenging conditions , but is perhaps better measured by our ability to remain kind and light spirited, even when we're sure that we can't bear the weight of one more ounce of life.
3438. Problemado ka ba at walang panggimik? Ito ang sagot dyan! Just text NANAY PENGE PERA at isend sa number nya! Ang dali, hindi ba? May chance ka pang mamura!
3439. Payabangan. Erni: Ang galing ng aso ko! Tuwing umaga, dala nya'ng dyaryo sa akin. Bert: Alam ko. Erni: Ha? Paano mo nalaman? Bert: Ikinikwento sa akin ng aso ko.
3440. There are times we treat life like a mysterious door. It doesn't open no matter how hard we push it! We never notice that a huge sign is posted there that reads, PULL.
3441. Slogans of famous presidents: Marcos: Mabuhay ang Filipino! Cory: Laban Filipino! Ramos: Sulong Filipino! Erap: Casino Filipino! GMA: Naloko ko ang Filipino!
3442. An airplane crashed at a town in Batangas: Media: Manong, pakilarawan po ng nangyari. Manong: Ala eh, nakow, garne ga utoy. Kakaalmusal ko laang. Gayak ako'y sisinsay sa kahanggan, ay natan-awan ko yaan sa alapaap ay nasisilaban. Bago sumirok ng papagay-on na akala mo'y papatak. Ginagaling na laang at sa sukalang are sumugba, ay kung sa kabayanan ga, ay di panay mga utas! Media: Ano daw??
3443. The secret of contentment is knowing how to enjoy what you have and be able to lose all the desire for things beyond your reach. Let's not be materialistic. Tama na yung magaganda at gwapong nilalang tayo.
3444. A playboy died. During a mass: Priest: He's an honest guy, good husband and family man. Wife: (whispered to her son) Anak, tingnan mo nga. Baka hindi na si papa mo yung nakaburol.
3445. Ang ingles ng nagpakamatay, suicide. Namatay sa bahay, homecide. Namatay sa inis, pesticide. Pinatay ng intsik. Intsikticide. Namatay sa ibabaw ng girl. In-sex-he-died.
3446. Waiting for someone you love isn't easy especially when while you're waiting, the one you are waiting for isn't aware that you are waiting. - Tongue twister yan, wag na mag-emote!
3447. Flash report: A thief broke into Malacanang. He stumbled into GMA and FG at the hall way. The first couple froze in silence. The thief panicked, ran away and screamed, "Magnanakaw!"
3448. Bruno: Tay, nasugatan ako! Tatay: Buti nga, hindi ka umiyak. Lalaki talaga ang anak ko! Bruno: Syempre naman po tay, sabi nga sa kani Fergie, "Big Girls Don't Cry."
3449. Think positive! Japanese archaeologist digging 100 meters down found copper wire, says, "Very good, our great ancestors of 1000 years already had telephone!" Americans dug 200 meters and found optical cable, says, "My God! This means our great forefathers already had broadband 2000 years ago!" Pinoy digs 500 meters and found nothing, says, "Ang lupit ng mga ninuno natin! Wireless!"
3450. Pulis: Bayad ko sa pancit. Tsino Himala, bakit ikaw bayad? Pulis: Utos ni chief. Bawal na ang kotong. Tsino: Ok, mula ngayon, baboy na lagay ko pancit mo, hindi na daga!
Contributors:
3401-3404, 3414-3419, 3423-3426, 3448-3450: Anonymous (+63910555***9)
3405, 3408-3413, 3431-3441: Asha (+63917898***7)
3406: Abet (+63917866***0)
3407: Noreen (+63919285***1)
3420-3421, 3443-3444: Anonymous (+63920801***3)
3422: Vahnrey (+63919227***5)
3427-3430, 3445-3447: Eroica
3442: Anonymous (+63906343***8)
May 15, 2008
text messages 3351 - 3400
3351. If you keep God inside your heart, there is nothing that will come into your life that you won't be able to handle. God bless you always!
3352. Those who appear in your life - whether to help or to harm - are all given by God. Meet all of them with a peaceful heart but with a warrior's spirit. You will fail many times, but in falling, you will learn, and in learning you will find your way. Remember, there are no mistakes in life - only lessons. And lessons will keep on repeating themselves until learned. God bless.
3353. God sends us joy to keep our hearts young, hope to enrich our lives, leisure to refresh our spirits and love to make our world beautiful. Have a nice day!
3354. May your morning be a garden of God's wonderful blessings and your life blossoms with every dream that's close to your heart. May God be with you in everything you do. Good morning!
3355. No matter how our dreams may seem unreachable, dream them anyway. No matter how we've been hurt by the people we love, love them anyway. No matter how hard life is, live it anyway. No matter how our prayers seem unanswered, pray them anyway. God will make a way! Good morning!
3356. Always stretch your heart and expand your love, so that it touches not only those who you give it to but also to those who need it so much. Gandang umaga!
3357. Life is like having a cup of coffee. You sit by the window, lift the cup and take a sip only to realize that somebody forgot to put the sugar. Too lazy to go for it, you somehow struggle thru that sugarless cup. Until you discovered undissolved sugar crystals sitting at the bottom. That's how life is, we sometimes forget to make an effort to value what is around us. Look around, maybe, the sweetness you are looking for is closer than you think. Start your day right. Flash a smile. Have your coffee. Make it sweet.
3358. Anyone who has ever really lived knows that there is no life without growth. When we stop growing, we stop living and start existing. But there is no growth without challenge and there is no challenge without change. Life is a series of changes that create challenges and if we are going to make it, we have to grow.
3359. If A is a success in life, than A equals x plus y plus z. Work is x; y is play; and z is keeping your mouth shut. - Albert Einstein
3360. Be thankful that you don't have everything you desire, if you did, what would there be to look forward to? Be thankful for the difficult times, it's during those times you grow. Be thankful for your limitations because they give you opportunities for improvement. Be thankful for your mistakes. They will teach you valuable lessons. Find a way to be thankful for your troubles and they can become your blessings.
3361. We can't own time to have long talks. We don't have nice chances for more laughs, but even though our worlds don't meet, I will always be your friend to keep.
3362. Another moon? Possible. Another sun? Possible? Another sky? Possible. Another you? Impossible! Because God can't make the same mistake twice. Hehehe.
3363. An old lady offers the bus driver some peanuts. So, the driver happily munches them. Every 5 minutes, she gives him a handful more peanuts. Driver: Why don't you eat them yourself? Old lady: I can't chew. Look, I have no teeth! Driver: Then, why did you buy them? Old lady: Oh, I just love the chocolate around them!
3364. Women are like the police. They can have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession.
3365. A message from the heart. If you don't take care of yourself, we'll take good care of you! - Funeraria Paz.
3366. In bed. Girl: Not tonight. I've got an appointment with my OB. Guy: Eh sa dentist, may appointment ka?
3367. A short story: Woman driving the road. Man driving up the same road. They pass by each other. Woman yells out the window. "Pig!" Man yells back, "B*tch!" Man rounds next curve and crashes into a huge pig in the middle of the road and dies. Lesson: If only men would listen.
3368. Wrong spelling can kill! Watch out. Husband on an out of town assignment texted his wife: Trip is wonderful. I'm having a good time. Wish you were her.
3369. Girl about to be married: Dad, I'm so sad to be leaving Mom! Dad: I understand. Don't let me stand in the of your happiness. Plaease, take your Mom with you!
3370. What's the difference between love and herpes? Herpes is forever!
3371. Kapag walang bolpen, walang notes. Kapag walang notes, walang pag-aaral. Kapag walang pag-aaral, walang diploma. Kapag walang diploma, walang work. Kapag walang work, walang pera. Kapag walang pera, walang pagkain. Kapag walang pagkain, magugutom. Kapag nagutom, papayat. Kapag pumayat, papanget. Kapag pumangit, walang gf/bf. Kapag walang gf/bf, walang asawa. Kapag walang asawa, walang anak. Kapag walang anak, madedepress. Kapag nadepress, magkakasakit. Kapag nagkasakit, mamamatay ka. Kapag namatay ka, wala ka na. Kaya, ingatan mo yang ballpen mo!
3372. Bakit walang kulay ang utot? Kasi, kung meron, mawawala yung thrill nang paghahanap kung sino ang umutot.
3373. Define love. According to the nurses and intelligent people, love is a sickness. Because everybody who gets it ends up in bed!
3374. Pare, tulungan mo ako. Panay kalabit ng asawa ko. Anong problema doon. Wala ka ba sa mood? Eh hindi ganoon. 3 taon nang patay ang asawa ko eh.
3375. Sino nakakita sa aksidente? Ako po sir! Buti naman may witness. Kita mo ba plate number? Oho, nagsisimula ho sa 4. Ano kasunod? Registration po.
3376. What do you call two ugly people stabbing each other? Answer: Saksakan ng pangit! Hehehe.
3377. Kung malaki ang eyebags mo, huwag mong ikahiya! Kasi, pinagpuyatan mo yan eh.
3378. Old lady calls to her daughter. Papauwi ka na ba? Asan ka na? Daughter: Andito po ako sa hospital. Her mom cried. Anong nangyari sa iyo?! Daughter: Inay! Nurse po ako! Nurse!!!
3379. May isang Mangyan sa Jollibee. Mangyan: Pabili ng pulot (honey). Crew: Wala po kaming tindang pulot. Mangyan: Kayabangan mo! Laking-laki nung bubuyog sa labas!
3380. Inday, punta ka sa botika. Ibili mo si sir ng Viagra. Maid: Sa iyo ba gagamitin ni Sir? Misis: Bakit? Maid: Kasi, pag sa akin, Red Bull lang, pwede na!
3381. Sen. Cayetano: It's now the turn of Sen. Lapid to ask witness Jun Lozada. Sen. Lapid: Ha? Pass! Sen. Cayetano: Hindi pwede. Dapat lahat tayo, magtanong! Huwag ka nang mahiya, anong nasa isip mo ngayon? Sen. Lapid: Ha? Eh, kaanu-ano mo si Ike Lozada?
3382. Kissing in the lips is great, but be sure you never close your eyes and not too long because you'll encounter a strange feeling called "Lee Bog!"
3383. Minsan, mas espesyal ang laway kaysa ngiti. Kasi, kahit sino, pwede mong ngitian, pero ang laway, tutulo lang sa taong gusto mong tikman!
3384. Money can't buy happiness, but somehow, it's more comfortable to cry in BMW than on a bicycle.
3385. How do you compare Erap and Mike Arroyo? Both are billionaires. Both Ateneans. Both fat. Both alias Jose. Both are liars. Pero si Erap, mas may taste sa babae!
3386. It's not true that beer makes you fat. It actually makes you lean. Lean on walls, lean on doors and lean on to the person you love. Yun yun eh! Lasing lasingan, para-paraan!
3387. Mike Arroyo met Gary Kasparov. Mike: If the present situation in my country is like a chess game, what would you do? Gary: Sacrifice the queen, ride the horse, leave the castle, follow the bishop and resign!
3388. Pari, nagmimisa. Sino sa inyo ang may kaaway? Taas kamay lahat pwera sa isang matandang babae. Pari: Si lola lang ang walang kaaway. Ano po ang edad nyo, lola? Lola: 93 anyos. Pari: Tingnan nyo si lola, 93 anyos na pero walang kaaway! Lola, bakit wala kayong kaaway? Lola: Patay na ang mga walang hiya!
3389. Men are like parking spots. The good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped. Hahaha.
3390. Alcohol solves no problems, neither does milk. Pero buti pa ang alak, libre kung minsan. Ang gatas? Meron bang nanglibre ng gatas at sabi, tara, dede tayo!?
3391. Daga1: Ako tapang! Kain ako ng Racumin! Daga2: Mas tapang ako. Kain ako ng cheese with mouse trap. Daga3: Ako tapang sa lahat! Girlfriend ko, pusa! Makes sense? Be brave enough to love someone whom you know might kill you in the end. Akalain mo, may moral lesson pa yun?! Hahaha!
3392. Kung amoy putok ka, be proud! Pinagpawisan mo yan eh!
3393. Chinese Diplomat: Madam Plesident, we heard you have a shortage of lies (rice). GMA: To tell you frankly, we will never run out of it!
3394. Sabi ng puso ko, mahal ko sya. Sabi ng utak ko, huwag, hindi tama. Sabi ko naman, O, baka yung atay, bituka, baga dyan, gusto ring magcomment. Go on!
3395. Kung hindi mo kayang magpaliwanag, magpagabi ka na lang!
3396. Anong isda ang mahilig magtampisaw sa ulan? Sagot: Hito! - Hito akooooo. Basang basa sa ulan, walang masisilungan. Haha!
3397. Pinadalhan ni Vicky Belo ng sulat ang lahat ng gwapo at magaganda. Alam mo ba kung ano ang laman ng sulat? Hindi mo alam? Hindi ka pinadalhan??!
3398. Bakit hindi pwedeng magsuot ng hairnet ang mga kalbo? Kasi, magmumukha silang microphone! Wahaha! Extreme! Extreme! Magic sing!
3399. Time, I've been passing time watching trains go by... - Guard sa LRT. Hahaha!
3400. Three men who were about to go to outer space but only allowed one thing to bring. Man1: I wanna go with my wife. I can't be without my wife for a year. Man2: I'll go with my book. I want to have more knowledge. Man3: Give me a pack of cigarettes, I'll die without it in my life. One year later, they came back. Man1 came out with a child, the second came and spoke words nonstop. The last man came out very angry. Tangna! Lighter nga pala! Sad noh?!
Contributors:
3351-3352, 3358, 3363, 3384-3400 :Asha (+63921955***9)
3353-3356. Anonymous (+63920801***3)
3357, 3362, 3364-3369, 3371-3383. Anonymous (+63910555***9)
3359, 3370: Eroica
3360-3361: Vahnrey (+639192274***5)
3352. Those who appear in your life - whether to help or to harm - are all given by God. Meet all of them with a peaceful heart but with a warrior's spirit. You will fail many times, but in falling, you will learn, and in learning you will find your way. Remember, there are no mistakes in life - only lessons. And lessons will keep on repeating themselves until learned. God bless.
3353. God sends us joy to keep our hearts young, hope to enrich our lives, leisure to refresh our spirits and love to make our world beautiful. Have a nice day!
3354. May your morning be a garden of God's wonderful blessings and your life blossoms with every dream that's close to your heart. May God be with you in everything you do. Good morning!
3355. No matter how our dreams may seem unreachable, dream them anyway. No matter how we've been hurt by the people we love, love them anyway. No matter how hard life is, live it anyway. No matter how our prayers seem unanswered, pray them anyway. God will make a way! Good morning!
3356. Always stretch your heart and expand your love, so that it touches not only those who you give it to but also to those who need it so much. Gandang umaga!
3357. Life is like having a cup of coffee. You sit by the window, lift the cup and take a sip only to realize that somebody forgot to put the sugar. Too lazy to go for it, you somehow struggle thru that sugarless cup. Until you discovered undissolved sugar crystals sitting at the bottom. That's how life is, we sometimes forget to make an effort to value what is around us. Look around, maybe, the sweetness you are looking for is closer than you think. Start your day right. Flash a smile. Have your coffee. Make it sweet.
3358. Anyone who has ever really lived knows that there is no life without growth. When we stop growing, we stop living and start existing. But there is no growth without challenge and there is no challenge without change. Life is a series of changes that create challenges and if we are going to make it, we have to grow.
3359. If A is a success in life, than A equals x plus y plus z. Work is x; y is play; and z is keeping your mouth shut. - Albert Einstein
3360. Be thankful that you don't have everything you desire, if you did, what would there be to look forward to? Be thankful for the difficult times, it's during those times you grow. Be thankful for your limitations because they give you opportunities for improvement. Be thankful for your mistakes. They will teach you valuable lessons. Find a way to be thankful for your troubles and they can become your blessings.
3361. We can't own time to have long talks. We don't have nice chances for more laughs, but even though our worlds don't meet, I will always be your friend to keep.
3362. Another moon? Possible. Another sun? Possible? Another sky? Possible. Another you? Impossible! Because God can't make the same mistake twice. Hehehe.
3363. An old lady offers the bus driver some peanuts. So, the driver happily munches them. Every 5 minutes, she gives him a handful more peanuts. Driver: Why don't you eat them yourself? Old lady: I can't chew. Look, I have no teeth! Driver: Then, why did you buy them? Old lady: Oh, I just love the chocolate around them!
3364. Women are like the police. They can have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession.
3365. A message from the heart. If you don't take care of yourself, we'll take good care of you! - Funeraria Paz.
3366. In bed. Girl: Not tonight. I've got an appointment with my OB. Guy: Eh sa dentist, may appointment ka?
3367. A short story: Woman driving the road. Man driving up the same road. They pass by each other. Woman yells out the window. "Pig!" Man yells back, "B*tch!" Man rounds next curve and crashes into a huge pig in the middle of the road and dies. Lesson: If only men would listen.
3368. Wrong spelling can kill! Watch out. Husband on an out of town assignment texted his wife: Trip is wonderful. I'm having a good time. Wish you were her.
3369. Girl about to be married: Dad, I'm so sad to be leaving Mom! Dad: I understand. Don't let me stand in the of your happiness. Plaease, take your Mom with you!
3370. What's the difference between love and herpes? Herpes is forever!
3371. Kapag walang bolpen, walang notes. Kapag walang notes, walang pag-aaral. Kapag walang pag-aaral, walang diploma. Kapag walang diploma, walang work. Kapag walang work, walang pera. Kapag walang pera, walang pagkain. Kapag walang pagkain, magugutom. Kapag nagutom, papayat. Kapag pumayat, papanget. Kapag pumangit, walang gf/bf. Kapag walang gf/bf, walang asawa. Kapag walang asawa, walang anak. Kapag walang anak, madedepress. Kapag nadepress, magkakasakit. Kapag nagkasakit, mamamatay ka. Kapag namatay ka, wala ka na. Kaya, ingatan mo yang ballpen mo!
3372. Bakit walang kulay ang utot? Kasi, kung meron, mawawala yung thrill nang paghahanap kung sino ang umutot.
3373. Define love. According to the nurses and intelligent people, love is a sickness. Because everybody who gets it ends up in bed!
3374. Pare, tulungan mo ako. Panay kalabit ng asawa ko. Anong problema doon. Wala ka ba sa mood? Eh hindi ganoon. 3 taon nang patay ang asawa ko eh.
3376. What do you call two ugly people stabbing each other? Answer: Saksakan ng pangit! Hehehe.
3377. Kung malaki ang eyebags mo, huwag mong ikahiya! Kasi, pinagpuyatan mo yan eh.
3378. Old lady calls to her daughter. Papauwi ka na ba? Asan ka na? Daughter: Andito po ako sa hospital. Her mom cried. Anong nangyari sa iyo?! Daughter: Inay! Nurse po ako! Nurse!!!
3379. May isang Mangyan sa Jollibee. Mangyan: Pabili ng pulot (honey). Crew: Wala po kaming tindang pulot. Mangyan: Kayabangan mo! Laking-laki nung bubuyog sa labas!
3380. Inday, punta ka sa botika. Ibili mo si sir ng Viagra. Maid: Sa iyo ba gagamitin ni Sir? Misis: Bakit? Maid: Kasi, pag sa akin, Red Bull lang, pwede na!
3381. Sen. Cayetano: It's now the turn of Sen. Lapid to ask witness Jun Lozada. Sen. Lapid: Ha? Pass! Sen. Cayetano: Hindi pwede. Dapat lahat tayo, magtanong! Huwag ka nang mahiya, anong nasa isip mo ngayon? Sen. Lapid: Ha? Eh, kaanu-ano mo si Ike Lozada?
3382. Kissing in the lips is great, but be sure you never close your eyes and not too long because you'll encounter a strange feeling called "Lee Bog!"
3383. Minsan, mas espesyal ang laway kaysa ngiti. Kasi, kahit sino, pwede mong ngitian, pero ang laway, tutulo lang sa taong gusto mong tikman!
3384. Money can't buy happiness, but somehow, it's more comfortable to cry in BMW than on a bicycle.
3385. How do you compare Erap and Mike Arroyo? Both are billionaires. Both Ateneans. Both fat. Both alias Jose. Both are liars. Pero si Erap, mas may taste sa babae!
3386. It's not true that beer makes you fat. It actually makes you lean. Lean on walls, lean on doors and lean on to the person you love. Yun yun eh! Lasing lasingan, para-paraan!
3387. Mike Arroyo met Gary Kasparov. Mike: If the present situation in my country is like a chess game, what would you do? Gary: Sacrifice the queen, ride the horse, leave the castle, follow the bishop and resign!
3388. Pari, nagmimisa. Sino sa inyo ang may kaaway? Taas kamay lahat pwera sa isang matandang babae. Pari: Si lola lang ang walang kaaway. Ano po ang edad nyo, lola? Lola: 93 anyos. Pari: Tingnan nyo si lola, 93 anyos na pero walang kaaway! Lola, bakit wala kayong kaaway? Lola: Patay na ang mga walang hiya!
3389. Men are like parking spots. The good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped. Hahaha.
3390. Alcohol solves no problems, neither does milk. Pero buti pa ang alak, libre kung minsan. Ang gatas? Meron bang nanglibre ng gatas at sabi, tara, dede tayo!?
3391. Daga1: Ako tapang! Kain ako ng Racumin! Daga2: Mas tapang ako. Kain ako ng cheese with mouse trap. Daga3: Ako tapang sa lahat! Girlfriend ko, pusa! Makes sense? Be brave enough to love someone whom you know might kill you in the end. Akalain mo, may moral lesson pa yun?! Hahaha!
3392. Kung amoy putok ka, be proud! Pinagpawisan mo yan eh!
3393. Chinese Diplomat: Madam Plesident, we heard you have a shortage of lies (rice). GMA: To tell you frankly, we will never run out of it!
3394. Sabi ng puso ko, mahal ko sya. Sabi ng utak ko, huwag, hindi tama. Sabi ko naman, O, baka yung atay, bituka, baga dyan, gusto ring magcomment. Go on!
3395. Kung hindi mo kayang magpaliwanag, magpagabi ka na lang!
3396. Anong isda ang mahilig magtampisaw sa ulan? Sagot: Hito! - Hito akooooo. Basang basa sa ulan, walang masisilungan. Haha!
3397. Pinadalhan ni Vicky Belo ng sulat ang lahat ng gwapo at magaganda. Alam mo ba kung ano ang laman ng sulat? Hindi mo alam? Hindi ka pinadalhan??!
3398. Bakit hindi pwedeng magsuot ng hairnet ang mga kalbo? Kasi, magmumukha silang microphone! Wahaha! Extreme! Extreme! Magic sing!
3399. Time, I've been passing time watching trains go by... - Guard sa LRT. Hahaha!
3400. Three men who were about to go to outer space but only allowed one thing to bring. Man1: I wanna go with my wife. I can't be without my wife for a year. Man2: I'll go with my book. I want to have more knowledge. Man3: Give me a pack of cigarettes, I'll die without it in my life. One year later, they came back. Man1 came out with a child, the second came and spoke words nonstop. The last man came out very angry. Tangna! Lighter nga pala! Sad noh?!
Contributors:
3351-3352, 3358, 3363, 3384-3400 :Asha (+63921955***9)
3353-3356. Anonymous (+63920801***3)
3357, 3362, 3364-3369, 3371-3383. Anonymous (+63910555***9)
3359, 3370: Eroica
3360-3361: Vahnrey (+639192274***5)
Mar 4, 2008
text messages 3251 - 3300
3251. Leave something for God but never leave God for something. Because in life, something will leave you, but God will always be there for you.
3252. God hides from us the things that we are not yet ready to receive. That's why when we try to get it ourselves, we end up with the second best. Just pray and wait.
3253. Life is an adventure of faith in God, full of surprises yet fulfilling, full of tests yet satisfying, and full of trials yet strengthening. Good morning!
3254. A painting of Christ knocking on a cottage door was critically examined by the artist friend to look for any mistakes in it. No one could find anything but admiration. Finally, a young artist found a basic mistake. "You forgot to paint the door handle or lock on the door." "My friend," the artist remarked, "when Christ knocks on the door of your house, it can only be opened from the inside." Good evening!
3255. Whenever you don't understand what's happening in your life, you just have to close your eyes, take a deep breath and say, "Lord, I know it's your plan, just help me thru it."
3256. Not all people can understand the way I am, some may hate me while some will love. But for all of these, I still love the way I am because I don't want to pretend as someone just to flatter anyone.
3257. Learn to apologize when the situation calls for it. Don't allow little issues to get out of hand. Stop thinking of yourself sometimes. Lower your pride and mean your apology. You'll be amazed how the words "I'm sorry" can mean much to someone in pain; much more if you're the reason for the hurt.
3258. The special reason for living is life itself. Finding it complicated, difficult and unfair is merely a part of it, and life would never be complete without it. Because life is like a chocolate, without a piece of bitterness, its sweetness would be useless.
3259. It's funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back, everything is different.
3260. Best age is encourage. Best mile is smile. Best stand is understand. Best end is friend. Best day is today. May God keep you happy and safe everyday.
3261. Life is like posing for pictures, we pose the way we want to be seen by others, but stolen shots are better. They capture who we really are.
3262. Learn. But always learn with other people by your side. Don't be alone in the search because if you take a wrong step, you'll have no one there to help put you right. - Paulo Coelho (The Witch of Portobello)
3263. Belief, hard work, and love - you have those things. you can do anything. - For One More Day.
3264. It is better to be a human being dissatisfied than a pig satisfied; better to be Socrates dissatisfied tha a fool satisfied. - John Stuart Mill
3265. Value things while you still can because you'll never know when they'll be gone. You can always fight for it but what if it's too late? That's when you realize your life is missing a piece and that piece will remain missing forever.
3266. A joke and a truth are not mutually exclusive. Sometimes, the best jokes are true and the best truth are jokes.
3267. The happiest people are those having the most simple lives and the least stressful lifestyles. Let us learn to simplify things. For simplicity is not just beauty. It is a blessing.
3268. If you're shopping for a happy ending and you couldn't find one, buy a new beginning instead.
3269. Happy thoughts remove life's pressures. They have healing powers and uplift spirits. They lead to blissful lives. Think happy today! God bless.
3270. Sometimes I wonder why sunset is more beautiful than sunrise. I guess it's an irony of life. Sometimes, better things could really happen saying goodbye.
3271. One of the reasons why people get so sentimental is because memories are the only things that don't change when everything else does.
3272. The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing on the right place, but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
3273. I know it's impossible that we'll always be together. But that doesn't mean we can't have a quantified laughs together, you know. I'll take whatever you can give cause I'm just happy to be with you.
3274. You'll never know how much you needed your friends until you look back along the rope and realized how many knots they tied to keep you from falling.
3275. My life is not really perfect, not so wonderful, but I have reasons to be happy because there are persons like you who's been good to me.
3276. Some of us are so busy now, forwarded messages are not merely just messages sent, but with it, goes a secret note saying I remember you still.
3277. Sometimes, you have to put walls up around you, not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down.
3278. People always think that the most painful thing is losing the one you love in your life. The truth is, the most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, forgetting that you are special too.
3279. It is so much easier to say that you don't love someone than try to explain to everyone all the reasons why you still do.
3280. Sometimes, when I'm alone, I can't help but think of all the things I've done in the past. I go out with my friends to drink and got drunk. Some people would ask why would I waste my money buying alcoholic drinks because it brings nothing and can ruin my life. They may be right and they may not understand the importance of drinking alcohol. But for me, those drinking sessions, I've found real friendship. We talked, we laughed, and we even started building dreams. That's the essence of drinking!
3281. Doctor: I'm sorry to tell you that you've got rabies. Patient: Please give me a piece of paper and pencil. Doctor: You don't have to write your will. Patient: No, I want to make a list of people to bite.
3282. Why did the chewing gum cross the road? Because he was stuck to the chicken's foot.
3283. In this world, every wife is a mistress to her husband. 1 hour of miss and 23 hours of stress.
3284. The secret of life is happiness. The secret of happiness is love. The secret of love is sacrifice. The secret of sacrifice is to obey your wife.
3285. They say I look good. I say, I taste even better! Hahaha!
3286. The Americans said: We felt and experienced pain and hardship since the 9/11. The Filipino said: We also felt and experienced that. When? The Americans ask. The Filipino said: Since 4/11. (The height of GMA).
3287. My doctor put me on a seafood diet. Now, I only eat when I see food.
3288. Lalaki, umuwi at nakita ang asawa na nakasexy lingerie. Wife: Itali mo ako, tapos, gawin mo ang nais mo. Itinali ng lalaki ang asawa, tapos, nag DOTA sya!
3289. The Philippines is overpopulated because: ayaw ng birth control, walang death penalty, daming jobless kaya babad kama, dami lasing kaya ganda lagi misis.
3290. Minsan ba, nakikita mo akong kausap ang sarili ko? Ngayon, malabo mo na yung makita. Kasi, nag-away kami. Parang tanga kasi!
3291. Sa isang school. Boy: Tapos ka na ba sa exam mo? Girl: Bakit naman? Boy: Wala lang. Para ako naman ang sagutin mo.
3292. Words to live by: Whenever I feel like working, I lie down until the feeling is gone. Katamaran at its best!
3294. Ang tunay na kagandahan at kagwapuhan ay hindi nakikita sa pisikal na anyo ng isang tao kundi nasa puso! Yan! Yan ang paniniwala ng mga panget! Tayo, quiet lang.
3295. Makabagong kasabihan, kagandahan edition: Para sa magaganda: Aanhin mo ang ganda, kung wala ka namang papa. Para sa gustong magpaganda, retokada: Kung gusto mong maglandi, tiisin mo ang hapdi. Para sa mga feeling maganda: Talbog ang matigas na tinapay sa tigas ng mukha ng nagmamagandang inday. Para sa mga walang ganda: Mabait man daw at magaling, ang chaka-chaka pa rin.
3296. There are two reasons why people change: either tapos na maligo, or basa na ng pawis.
3297. Erap (nageexercise): 1234 Amen, 5678 Amen, 8765 Amen, 4321 Amen! Jinggoy: Dad, bakit may pa Amen, Amen pa kayo? Erap: Kasi, sabi ng doctor ko, exercise religiously.
3298. Malas daw si GMA sa letrang J. Jose Miguel Arroyo, Joseph Estrada, Jocjoc Bolante, Joey de Venecia, Jose de Venecia, Jun Lozada. Hindi pa kasama dun ang hamburJer ni Abalos!
3299. Today, when you feel like nobody loves you and when you feel like everyone is against you, don't panic! Pito na kayo nina GMA, FG, Defensor, Neri, Atienza, Abalos at Razon!
3300. Lozada: 1/2 Pinoy 1/2 Intsik. Apostol: 1/2 Pinoy 1/2 Bulol. Joker Arroyo: 1/2 Pinoy 1/2 Pikon. Santiago: 1/2 Pinay 1/2 Buang. Enrile: 1/2 GMA 1/2 Erap. Neri: 1/2 Pinoy 1/2 Pinay. Gonzales: 1/2 Pinoy 1/2 Linta. Razon: 1/2 Pinoy 1/2 Patola. Donald Dee: 1/2 Intsik 1/2 Traydor. FG: 1/2 Pork 1/2 Buwaya. GMA: 1/2 lang.
Contributors:
3251, 3257-3261, 3274, 3280-3281: Asha (+63917898***7)
3252-3254, 3266-3271, 3276-3279, 3283-3287, 3289-3297, 3299-3300: Anonymous (+63910555***9)
3255, 3272: Nicely
3256: Vahnrey (+63919227***5)
3262-3265, 3288: Eroica (+63917808***9)
3273: Dudai (+63920209***2)
3275, 3298: Anonymous (+63920801***3)
3282: Ariel (277001010***2)
3252. God hides from us the things that we are not yet ready to receive. That's why when we try to get it ourselves, we end up with the second best. Just pray and wait.
3253. Life is an adventure of faith in God, full of surprises yet fulfilling, full of tests yet satisfying, and full of trials yet strengthening. Good morning!
3254. A painting of Christ knocking on a cottage door was critically examined by the artist friend to look for any mistakes in it. No one could find anything but admiration. Finally, a young artist found a basic mistake. "You forgot to paint the door handle or lock on the door." "My friend," the artist remarked, "when Christ knocks on the door of your house, it can only be opened from the inside." Good evening!
3255. Whenever you don't understand what's happening in your life, you just have to close your eyes, take a deep breath and say, "Lord, I know it's your plan, just help me thru it."
3256. Not all people can understand the way I am, some may hate me while some will love. But for all of these, I still love the way I am because I don't want to pretend as someone just to flatter anyone.
3257. Learn to apologize when the situation calls for it. Don't allow little issues to get out of hand. Stop thinking of yourself sometimes. Lower your pride and mean your apology. You'll be amazed how the words "I'm sorry" can mean much to someone in pain; much more if you're the reason for the hurt.
3258. The special reason for living is life itself. Finding it complicated, difficult and unfair is merely a part of it, and life would never be complete without it. Because life is like a chocolate, without a piece of bitterness, its sweetness would be useless.
3259. It's funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back, everything is different.
3260. Best age is encourage. Best mile is smile. Best stand is understand. Best end is friend. Best day is today. May God keep you happy and safe everyday.
3261. Life is like posing for pictures, we pose the way we want to be seen by others, but stolen shots are better. They capture who we really are.
3262. Learn. But always learn with other people by your side. Don't be alone in the search because if you take a wrong step, you'll have no one there to help put you right. - Paulo Coelho (The Witch of Portobello)
3263. Belief, hard work, and love - you have those things. you can do anything. - For One More Day.
3264. It is better to be a human being dissatisfied than a pig satisfied; better to be Socrates dissatisfied tha a fool satisfied. - John Stuart Mill
3265. Value things while you still can because you'll never know when they'll be gone. You can always fight for it but what if it's too late? That's when you realize your life is missing a piece and that piece will remain missing forever.
3266. A joke and a truth are not mutually exclusive. Sometimes, the best jokes are true and the best truth are jokes.
3267. The happiest people are those having the most simple lives and the least stressful lifestyles. Let us learn to simplify things. For simplicity is not just beauty. It is a blessing.
3268. If you're shopping for a happy ending and you couldn't find one, buy a new beginning instead.
3269. Happy thoughts remove life's pressures. They have healing powers and uplift spirits. They lead to blissful lives. Think happy today! God bless.
3270. Sometimes I wonder why sunset is more beautiful than sunrise. I guess it's an irony of life. Sometimes, better things could really happen saying goodbye.
3271. One of the reasons why people get so sentimental is because memories are the only things that don't change when everything else does.
3272. The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing on the right place, but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
3273. I know it's impossible that we'll always be together. But that doesn't mean we can't have a quantified laughs together, you know. I'll take whatever you can give cause I'm just happy to be with you.
3274. You'll never know how much you needed your friends until you look back along the rope and realized how many knots they tied to keep you from falling.
3275. My life is not really perfect, not so wonderful, but I have reasons to be happy because there are persons like you who's been good to me.
3277. Sometimes, you have to put walls up around you, not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down.
3278. People always think that the most painful thing is losing the one you love in your life. The truth is, the most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, forgetting that you are special too.
3279. It is so much easier to say that you don't love someone than try to explain to everyone all the reasons why you still do.
3280. Sometimes, when I'm alone, I can't help but think of all the things I've done in the past. I go out with my friends to drink and got drunk. Some people would ask why would I waste my money buying alcoholic drinks because it brings nothing and can ruin my life. They may be right and they may not understand the importance of drinking alcohol. But for me, those drinking sessions, I've found real friendship. We talked, we laughed, and we even started building dreams. That's the essence of drinking!
3281. Doctor: I'm sorry to tell you that you've got rabies. Patient: Please give me a piece of paper and pencil. Doctor: You don't have to write your will. Patient: No, I want to make a list of people to bite.
3282. Why did the chewing gum cross the road? Because he was stuck to the chicken's foot.
3283. In this world, every wife is a mistress to her husband. 1 hour of miss and 23 hours of stress.
3284. The secret of life is happiness. The secret of happiness is love. The secret of love is sacrifice. The secret of sacrifice is to obey your wife.
3285. They say I look good. I say, I taste even better! Hahaha!
3286. The Americans said: We felt and experienced pain and hardship since the 9/11. The Filipino said: We also felt and experienced that. When? The Americans ask. The Filipino said: Since 4/11. (The height of GMA).
3287. My doctor put me on a seafood diet. Now, I only eat when I see food.
3288. Lalaki, umuwi at nakita ang asawa na nakasexy lingerie. Wife: Itali mo ako, tapos, gawin mo ang nais mo. Itinali ng lalaki ang asawa, tapos, nag DOTA sya!
3289. The Philippines is overpopulated because: ayaw ng birth control, walang death penalty, daming jobless kaya babad kama, dami lasing kaya ganda lagi misis.
3290. Minsan ba, nakikita mo akong kausap ang sarili ko? Ngayon, malabo mo na yung makita. Kasi, nag-away kami. Parang tanga kasi!
3291. Sa isang school. Boy: Tapos ka na ba sa exam mo? Girl: Bakit naman? Boy: Wala lang. Para ako naman ang sagutin mo.
3292. Words to live by: Whenever I feel like working, I lie down until the feeling is gone. Katamaran at its best!
3294. Ang tunay na kagandahan at kagwapuhan ay hindi nakikita sa pisikal na anyo ng isang tao kundi nasa puso! Yan! Yan ang paniniwala ng mga panget! Tayo, quiet lang.
3295. Makabagong kasabihan, kagandahan edition: Para sa magaganda: Aanhin mo ang ganda, kung wala ka namang papa. Para sa gustong magpaganda, retokada: Kung gusto mong maglandi, tiisin mo ang hapdi. Para sa mga feeling maganda: Talbog ang matigas na tinapay sa tigas ng mukha ng nagmamagandang inday. Para sa mga walang ganda: Mabait man daw at magaling, ang chaka-chaka pa rin.
3296. There are two reasons why people change: either tapos na maligo, or basa na ng pawis.
3297. Erap (nageexercise): 1234 Amen, 5678 Amen, 8765 Amen, 4321 Amen! Jinggoy: Dad, bakit may pa Amen, Amen pa kayo? Erap: Kasi, sabi ng doctor ko, exercise religiously.
3298. Malas daw si GMA sa letrang J. Jose Miguel Arroyo, Joseph Estrada, Jocjoc Bolante, Joey de Venecia, Jose de Venecia, Jun Lozada. Hindi pa kasama dun ang hamburJer ni Abalos!
3299. Today, when you feel like nobody loves you and when you feel like everyone is against you, don't panic! Pito na kayo nina GMA, FG, Defensor, Neri, Atienza, Abalos at Razon!
3300. Lozada: 1/2 Pinoy 1/2 Intsik. Apostol: 1/2 Pinoy 1/2 Bulol. Joker Arroyo: 1/2 Pinoy 1/2 Pikon. Santiago: 1/2 Pinay 1/2 Buang. Enrile: 1/2 GMA 1/2 Erap. Neri: 1/2 Pinoy 1/2 Pinay. Gonzales: 1/2 Pinoy 1/2 Linta. Razon: 1/2 Pinoy 1/2 Patola. Donald Dee: 1/2 Intsik 1/2 Traydor. FG: 1/2 Pork 1/2 Buwaya. GMA: 1/2 lang.
Contributors:
3251, 3257-3261, 3274, 3280-3281: Asha (+63917898***7)
3252-3254, 3266-3271, 3276-3279, 3283-3287, 3289-3297, 3299-3300: Anonymous (+63910555***9)
3255, 3272: Nicely
3256: Vahnrey (+63919227***5)
3262-3265, 3288: Eroica (+63917808***9)
3273: Dudai (+63920209***2)
3275, 3298: Anonymous (+63920801***3)
3282: Ariel (277001010***2)
Oct 17, 2007
text messages 3051 - 3100
3051. When God gives you one important thing in life, never hold it too tight so when He asks you to give it back, it's easy to let go without hurting so bad.
3052. Sometimes, you have to fight for something to make everything alright. You give your best and you give your all, yet, you still lose. But if ever you get tired, tell Jesus, He'll take the fight and win it all with you!
3053. God's love is a candle in the dark. No matter how gloomy our life may be, just one little touch of His love is enough to bring warmth and light. God bless.
3054. Good things you've done will never be lost, your kind act takes root and every bit of love you show will come right back to you. For God knows you have a good heart. God bless. Good morning!
3055. We may have struggles with God's timing and the mystery of His will in our lives but His promise stands. He will make everything beautiful in His time. Good morning!
3056. If you walk 1000 miles away from God, you will only need one step backward to get to him because He always follows you wherever you go and whatever you do. He still loves you. Good morning!
3057. Jesus will knock on the door of your heart today, looking for a place to stay. The moment you see Him, let Him in, offer Him the best room in your heart.
3058. God's love is the voice when you can't speak, the strength when you are weak, the hope when you are down, and the smile when you are sad. Stay happy!
3059. Sometimes we think we have so little and always wanting But if we start to appreciate the little things in life, we will find out that we have so much. So much of family and friends, so much of love and so much of God in our hearts.
3060. Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Do not seek the answers, which cannot be given now; rather, live the questions. All good things come to those who wait. Patience is the companion of wisdom. It is bitter, but its fruit is sweet. God bless.
3061. Sometimes, you need to experience everything so that you would learn. There's no easy way in living life so live it as it is. Cry. Laugh. Be crazy. And don't miss the chances that life is giving you because the most important things are not things at all. Most of the time, they are PEOPLE making your life worth living.
3062. Our envy always lasts longetr than the happiness of those we envy. - Heraclitus.
3063. "Special" is different from "important." Special - someone you'll never forget for the rest of your life. Important - someone you need for the rest of your life.
3064. Specific emotions weaken certain organs in the body. Anger weakens the liver, grief: lungs, worry: stomach, and fear: kidney. So stay happy and healthy!
3065. Thought of the day: A little kindness from person to person is better than a vast love for all humankind.
3066. Life is a rope that swings us through hope. Always believe that today is better than yesterday, and tomorrow will be much better than today. Have a nice week ahead!
3067. Sometimes when you sacrifice something precious, you're not really losing it. You're just passing it on to someone else. - The Five People You Meet In Heaven.
3068. Three reasons why laughing is good for your health: 1. Your heart - laughing lowers your blood pressure while increasing the amount of oxygen carried in your blood. 2. Your lungs - a deep belly laugh is like an internal aerobic workout, helping you breath more efficiently. 3. Your anxiety level - laughing lowers levels of the stress hormone cortisol, reducing tension. So take time to laugh even at the corniest joke!
3069. Unless your heart, your soul and your whole being are behind every decision you make, the words from your mouth will be empty and the actions will be meaningless. Truth and confidence are the roots of happiness. - Kathleen Pederson.
3070. To do good things in the world, first you must know who you are and what gives meaning to your life.- Paula P. Brownlee.
3071. It doesn't interest me if the story you're telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not to betray your own soul. If you can be faithful and therefore be trustworthy. If you can see beauty even when it's not pretty everyday. If you can source your life from God's presence. If you can live without failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of lake and shout to the silver of full moon, "Yes!" - Oriah Mountain Dreamar, Indian elder.
3072. Better break your word than do wars in keeping it. - Thomas Fuller.
3073. To be loved is to live in someone's heart. Don't hold something in your arms that you are not willing to hold in your heart.
3074. I refused to believe in my instincts when I should have to believe it.
3075. Nobody is a victim, it's probably a self made; and to suffer sometimes is our own choice; the very fruit of our own actions.
3076. Keep your friends close, your enemies closer. - Michael Corleone,"The Godfather II"
3077. Popular opinion is the greatest lie. - Carlisle
3078. A long life may not be enough, but a good life is good enough.
3079. All truth is good, but not all truth is good to say.
3080. Anger is just one letter short from danger.
3081. To handle yourself, use your head. To handle others, use your heart.
3082. Revenge gets you even with your enemy, forgiving him/her puts you above him/her.
3083. Did you know that 92% of what we worry about never really happens? And the 8% left is usually manageable? Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it gets you nowhere. So, don't worry too much, things have a way of working out and what's meant to happen will happen. ;)
3084. I never think of the future - it comes soon enough. - Albert Einstein.
3085. If you're catching two rabbits, you will not catch either one. - Russian proverb.
3086. I don't have sympathy for the boy who cried wolf. Sometimes, liars have to learn the hardest way there is, because lying kills. - Empress.
3087. If there is something better than sharing with others the best of what you have, it is sharing with others the best of who you are. God bless!
3088. Walk this day with great confidence in your heart, for you have much to offer. A lot of people await the goodness and love that you carry within. Good morning and God bless!
3089. Fulfillment doesn't merely mean achieving your highest dream in life, but also living a life that has made the lives of others worth living. Good morning!
3090. Erap dreamed that he died and went to heaven. St. Peter gave him Ai-ai delas Alas as partner, saying, "Kung mabait ka sana, mas maganda ang partner mo." Erap saw Chavit with Gretchen Barretto and said, "Bakit si Chavit, mas madaming kasalanan, si Gretchen ang partner?" St. Peter: Iho, parusa yan kay Gretchen.
3091. "Give strong drink to those who are perishing, wine to those who are in anguish. Let them drink and remember their misery no more." Proverbs 31:6-7. Bible na yung nagsabi! Octoberfest na! :)
3092. Ako ay may lobo, lumipad sa langit, hindi ko na nakita, pumutok na pala, sayang lang pera ko, pambili ng lobo, kung lalaki sana, naaliw pa ako! :)
3093. Wives should be precise in giving orders to their maids. Example: "Inday, alis ako, pakainin mo si kuya mo bago sya pumasok!" Maid: Kuya! Kainin mo daw ako bago mo ipasok!
3094. What's in the number 7? Why is it God's perfect number? When in fact, 7 is an odd number. Just think, there are 7 days in a week, 7 wonders of the world. In the Bible, you must forgive a person 70 times 7. Even the word forgive has 7 letters. The rainbow has 7 colors and 7 letters. Even the word promise. Maybe, God designed it. For even the word mystery has 7 letters. Begin to see all the 7's in life. Use Olay Total Effects to fight the 7 signs of skin aging.
3095. The best rehab center is the vag!na. Lahat ng pumasok, hard headed, brusko, bully at tigasin. Paglabas, nanlalata, nalalambot, humble, with no sign of vengeance! Hehehe.
3096. Mga makabagong kasabihan! 1. Aanhin mo ang gwapo, kung mas malandi pa sa iyo. 2. Walang matinong lalake, sa malanding kumpare. 3. Wala nang hihigit pa sa malansang isda, kundi ang isang baklang balahura. 4. Sa hinaba-haba ng prosisyon, bading din pala ang karelasyon. 5. Ang tumatakbo ng matulin, may gwapong hahabulin! 6. Matalino man ang bading, napeperahan pa rin.
3097. Misis: Pinuyat mo ako kagabi! Mister: Bakit? Misis: Nagsasalita ka sa pagtulog. Puro pangalan ng babae. Lani, Joy, Beth, Samantha, Michelle, Hannah, Charisse, Rosemarie, Vivian... Mister: Paano ka naman napuyat? Misis: Kakahintay sa pangalan ko!
3098. Nagalit si Juan dahil puro Flor ang ipinangalan ng misis nya sa triplets nila. Juan: Paano mo ngayon tatawagin ang mga bata? Misis: Ang dali! First Flor, Second Flor, Third Flor!
3099. Ey guys! Sorry for the short notice, I'm leaving soon. I'm having my despedida party tomorrow, Saturday, 29th of September, 2007, at the hiphop VIP lounge, Embassy, The Fort. I just invited a few friends so your presence will be greatly appreciated. I will be at the VIP lounge by 10pm. I'm really looking forward to see you there because I want to spend my last days here in Manila with you guys! See yah! - Text ni Inday sa mga friends nya kasi magbabakasyon sya sa province.
3100. Man is the highest form of animal. He is made to be above all except God. So, no matter how high EAGLES soar, how FALCONS attack, how BULLDOGS bare, how agressive TIGERS are, how fast TAMARAWS run, they will always succumb to that one GREEN ARCHER, standing with his bow and arrow aimed to fire! What about the WARRIOR? The GREEN ARCHER just made a bull's eye! Animo La Salle!!! - reflection ni Inday sa UAAP Finals. Lasallista kasi ang anak ng amo nya!
Contributors:
3051-3068, 3091-3096: : Asha (+63917898***7)
3069-3075, 3097-3098: Dudai (+63920209***2)
3076-3086, 3099-3100: Eroica
3087-3090: Anonymous (+639208011793)
3052. Sometimes, you have to fight for something to make everything alright. You give your best and you give your all, yet, you still lose. But if ever you get tired, tell Jesus, He'll take the fight and win it all with you!
3053. God's love is a candle in the dark. No matter how gloomy our life may be, just one little touch of His love is enough to bring warmth and light. God bless.
3054. Good things you've done will never be lost, your kind act takes root and every bit of love you show will come right back to you. For God knows you have a good heart. God bless. Good morning!
3055. We may have struggles with God's timing and the mystery of His will in our lives but His promise stands. He will make everything beautiful in His time. Good morning!
3056. If you walk 1000 miles away from God, you will only need one step backward to get to him because He always follows you wherever you go and whatever you do. He still loves you. Good morning!
3057. Jesus will knock on the door of your heart today, looking for a place to stay. The moment you see Him, let Him in, offer Him the best room in your heart.
3058. God's love is the voice when you can't speak, the strength when you are weak, the hope when you are down, and the smile when you are sad. Stay happy!
3059. Sometimes we think we have so little and always wanting But if we start to appreciate the little things in life, we will find out that we have so much. So much of family and friends, so much of love and so much of God in our hearts.
3060. Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Do not seek the answers, which cannot be given now; rather, live the questions. All good things come to those who wait. Patience is the companion of wisdom. It is bitter, but its fruit is sweet. God bless.
3061. Sometimes, you need to experience everything so that you would learn. There's no easy way in living life so live it as it is. Cry. Laugh. Be crazy. And don't miss the chances that life is giving you because the most important things are not things at all. Most of the time, they are PEOPLE making your life worth living.
3062. Our envy always lasts longetr than the happiness of those we envy. - Heraclitus.
3063. "Special" is different from "important." Special - someone you'll never forget for the rest of your life. Important - someone you need for the rest of your life.
3064. Specific emotions weaken certain organs in the body. Anger weakens the liver, grief: lungs, worry: stomach, and fear: kidney. So stay happy and healthy!
3065. Thought of the day: A little kindness from person to person is better than a vast love for all humankind.
3066. Life is a rope that swings us through hope. Always believe that today is better than yesterday, and tomorrow will be much better than today. Have a nice week ahead!
3067. Sometimes when you sacrifice something precious, you're not really losing it. You're just passing it on to someone else. - The Five People You Meet In Heaven.
3068. Three reasons why laughing is good for your health: 1. Your heart - laughing lowers your blood pressure while increasing the amount of oxygen carried in your blood. 2. Your lungs - a deep belly laugh is like an internal aerobic workout, helping you breath more efficiently. 3. Your anxiety level - laughing lowers levels of the stress hormone cortisol, reducing tension. So take time to laugh even at the corniest joke!
3069. Unless your heart, your soul and your whole being are behind every decision you make, the words from your mouth will be empty and the actions will be meaningless. Truth and confidence are the roots of happiness. - Kathleen Pederson.
3070. To do good things in the world, first you must know who you are and what gives meaning to your life.- Paula P. Brownlee.
3071. It doesn't interest me if the story you're telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not to betray your own soul. If you can be faithful and therefore be trustworthy. If you can see beauty even when it's not pretty everyday. If you can source your life from God's presence. If you can live without failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of lake and shout to the silver of full moon, "Yes!" - Oriah Mountain Dreamar, Indian elder.
3072. Better break your word than do wars in keeping it. - Thomas Fuller.
3073. To be loved is to live in someone's heart. Don't hold something in your arms that you are not willing to hold in your heart.
3074. I refused to believe in my instincts when I should have to believe it.
3075. Nobody is a victim, it's probably a self made; and to suffer sometimes is our own choice; the very fruit of our own actions.
3077. Popular opinion is the greatest lie. - Carlisle
3078. A long life may not be enough, but a good life is good enough.
3079. All truth is good, but not all truth is good to say.
3080. Anger is just one letter short from danger.
3081. To handle yourself, use your head. To handle others, use your heart.
3082. Revenge gets you even with your enemy, forgiving him/her puts you above him/her.
3083. Did you know that 92% of what we worry about never really happens? And the 8% left is usually manageable? Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it gets you nowhere. So, don't worry too much, things have a way of working out and what's meant to happen will happen. ;)
3084. I never think of the future - it comes soon enough. - Albert Einstein.
3085. If you're catching two rabbits, you will not catch either one. - Russian proverb.
3086. I don't have sympathy for the boy who cried wolf. Sometimes, liars have to learn the hardest way there is, because lying kills. - Empress.
3087. If there is something better than sharing with others the best of what you have, it is sharing with others the best of who you are. God bless!
3088. Walk this day with great confidence in your heart, for you have much to offer. A lot of people await the goodness and love that you carry within. Good morning and God bless!
3089. Fulfillment doesn't merely mean achieving your highest dream in life, but also living a life that has made the lives of others worth living. Good morning!
3090. Erap dreamed that he died and went to heaven. St. Peter gave him Ai-ai delas Alas as partner, saying, "Kung mabait ka sana, mas maganda ang partner mo." Erap saw Chavit with Gretchen Barretto and said, "Bakit si Chavit, mas madaming kasalanan, si Gretchen ang partner?" St. Peter: Iho, parusa yan kay Gretchen.
3091. "Give strong drink to those who are perishing, wine to those who are in anguish. Let them drink and remember their misery no more." Proverbs 31:6-7. Bible na yung nagsabi! Octoberfest na! :)
3092. Ako ay may lobo, lumipad sa langit, hindi ko na nakita, pumutok na pala, sayang lang pera ko, pambili ng lobo, kung lalaki sana, naaliw pa ako! :)
3093. Wives should be precise in giving orders to their maids. Example: "Inday, alis ako, pakainin mo si kuya mo bago sya pumasok!" Maid: Kuya! Kainin mo daw ako bago mo ipasok!
3094. What's in the number 7? Why is it God's perfect number? When in fact, 7 is an odd number. Just think, there are 7 days in a week, 7 wonders of the world. In the Bible, you must forgive a person 70 times 7. Even the word forgive has 7 letters. The rainbow has 7 colors and 7 letters. Even the word promise. Maybe, God designed it. For even the word mystery has 7 letters. Begin to see all the 7's in life. Use Olay Total Effects to fight the 7 signs of skin aging.
3095. The best rehab center is the vag!na. Lahat ng pumasok, hard headed, brusko, bully at tigasin. Paglabas, nanlalata, nalalambot, humble, with no sign of vengeance! Hehehe.
3096. Mga makabagong kasabihan! 1. Aanhin mo ang gwapo, kung mas malandi pa sa iyo. 2. Walang matinong lalake, sa malanding kumpare. 3. Wala nang hihigit pa sa malansang isda, kundi ang isang baklang balahura. 4. Sa hinaba-haba ng prosisyon, bading din pala ang karelasyon. 5. Ang tumatakbo ng matulin, may gwapong hahabulin! 6. Matalino man ang bading, napeperahan pa rin.
3097. Misis: Pinuyat mo ako kagabi! Mister: Bakit? Misis: Nagsasalita ka sa pagtulog. Puro pangalan ng babae. Lani, Joy, Beth, Samantha, Michelle, Hannah, Charisse, Rosemarie, Vivian... Mister: Paano ka naman napuyat? Misis: Kakahintay sa pangalan ko!
3098. Nagalit si Juan dahil puro Flor ang ipinangalan ng misis nya sa triplets nila. Juan: Paano mo ngayon tatawagin ang mga bata? Misis: Ang dali! First Flor, Second Flor, Third Flor!
3099. Ey guys! Sorry for the short notice, I'm leaving soon. I'm having my despedida party tomorrow, Saturday, 29th of September, 2007, at the hiphop VIP lounge, Embassy, The Fort. I just invited a few friends so your presence will be greatly appreciated. I will be at the VIP lounge by 10pm. I'm really looking forward to see you there because I want to spend my last days here in Manila with you guys! See yah! - Text ni Inday sa mga friends nya kasi magbabakasyon sya sa province.
3100. Man is the highest form of animal. He is made to be above all except God. So, no matter how high EAGLES soar, how FALCONS attack, how BULLDOGS bare, how agressive TIGERS are, how fast TAMARAWS run, they will always succumb to that one GREEN ARCHER, standing with his bow and arrow aimed to fire! What about the WARRIOR? The GREEN ARCHER just made a bull's eye! Animo La Salle!!! - reflection ni Inday sa UAAP Finals. Lasallista kasi ang anak ng amo nya!
Contributors:
3051-3068, 3091-3096: : Asha (+63917898***7)
3069-3075, 3097-3098: Dudai (+63920209***2)
3076-3086, 3099-3100: Eroica
3087-3090: Anonymous (+639208011793)
Oct 9, 2007
text messages 3001 - 3050
3001. Little prayers for little things fly heavenwards on little wings, and for all prayers great or small, God is there to read them all. Good night.
3002. We all are soldiers of God. So, when you feel tired, wounded, and weak, don't give up. The battle is at its peak. And in God's lead, we will always find victory.
3003. Heavy rains remind me of challenges in life. Never ask for lighter rain, just a better umbrella. Good day, enjoy life!
3004. Don't believe a word, a promise till it's done right before your eyes. But keep on believing, still a choice.
3005. To die and part is a less evil; but to part and live, there, there is the torment. - George Lansdowne
3006. As long as forever is through, I'll be over you. - Toto.
3007. Who knows what we live, and struggle, and die? Wise men write many books, in words too hard to understand. But this, the purpose of our lives, the end of all struggle,is beyond all human wisdom. - Allan Paton
3008. People takes different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they're not on your road doesn't mean they've gotten lost. - H. Jackson Brown.
3009. There is only one way to happiness, and that is to cease worrying things which are beyond the power of will. - Epictecus.
3010. One's philosophy is not best expressed in words, it is expressed in the choices one makes, and the choices we make are ultimately our responsibility. - Eleanor Roosevelt.
3011. Why would I avoid those who hate me? When I could make their lives miserable just by existing. :)
3012. The greatest trick the devil has pulled, is to convince the world that he did not exist. - Keyser Soze
3013. True friends are like mornings, you can't have them the whole day but you can be sure that they'll be there when you wake up tomorrow, next year and forever. Thanks for being one of my beautiful sunrises. ;)
3014. Have you ever thanked friends for their smiles? Their hellos? Their taps on your back? Their way of calling your name? All of the little and simplest form of love? Small things usually go unnoticed, but in reality, they're the ones that keep us going! Thank you!
3015. The miracles in our lives are simply the making of a few loving friends who care much, love for real and see us so much beyond ourselves. Have a good morning!
3016. How are you today? A message from my heart, a place where I keep special people like you. Good morning!
3017. Sometimes, you need to hold a friend's hand, not for love, but for the comfort and security it brings. I got 2 hands and if anything goes wrong, I promise you'll have them both.
3018. It ain't the things you got, it ain't the things you do. It ain't the things you're not, it's because you are you. It ain't about wordly treasure, it ain't about a piece of art, it ain't about anything you can measure, it's about what's in your heart. What is it? It's a friend, tried and true. Dude, that's what I found in you.
3019. Few will have the greatness to bend love stories itself, but each one of us can work to change a portion of our hearts, and in the total of all those acts will be written deep in our souls.
3020. Oftentimes, you use your words to soothe someone else's feelings because you know only that words could shut that someone up even when you know in your heart you don't really mean it.
3021. Love is the only way to grasp another human being in the innermost core of his personality. - Victor Frankel
3022. Don't ever think that I don't miss you, because even when you're near beside me, I just can't get enough of you. So, what do I call it when you are far apart? Feel like dying to see and hold you again.
3023. People say I'm strong because I'm numb to any pain. Actually, it's my special technique. What they don't know is that I had to break my heart a million times just to master it.
3024. If your heart gets broken, it's not a sin to cry, it's not a crime to mourn, but it's not right to ruin your own life. Because in love, you should know when to move on if there's no reason to hold on.
3025. What should really count? Is it the time you find yourself smiling thinking of that person, giggling about the moments you've had with him/her? Or the time you found yourself crying because someone makes you so happy, it melts your heart? It's just simple... be with someone who knows what they have when they have you.
3026. The Law of Science: Nothing is displaced unless it is replaced. Translated into: The Law of Love: You'll fall out of love only if you fall for someone else.
3027. Life depends on the way you think. For example, read this: Mypenisinhermouth. What did you read? My pen is in her mouth. Or did your dirty mind read something else?
3028. A man found a genie who granted him 3 wishes. Genie was told to provide all things he lacked. Genie found that he had no water so he gave him water. Genie saw that he had no money, so he was given a bank. Genie then saw that he had no problem, genie gave him a wife. :)
3029. Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable. :) By Cher, Men Are From Mars.
3030. Life is easier if we are not beautiful. But since we are, life is difficult!
3031. To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot even if you don't understand her at all!
3032. Please warn your male friends to be wary of a clever scam in Megamall parking where my friend himself was a victim. Two pretty 19-year old girls will approach you and ask for a ride Once inside the car, they start making love to each other and one will move up and perform oral sex on you while the other steals your wallet. He lost his wallet on Wednesday, Friday and twice this Saturday. He's going to buy more wallets tomorrow. Hehehe.
3033. A 50-year old lady is dying of cancer, asks God to give her 25 years more and God approves. After her successful operation, she gets facelift, lipo, tummytuck at paglabas nya ng hospital, nasagasaan sya! She asks God, "Lord, bakit sabi nyo, bibigyan nyo pa ako ng 25 years para mabuhay?" God: Sorry ha, hindi kita nakilala!
3034. Pinoy coping mechanism at work! A: Magkano po ang tinola? M: 20 lang. A: May sabaw? M: Libre na ang sabaw namin. A: Kanin, meron? M: 5 lang. A: May tutong? M: Libre na. A: Sige manong, tutong at sabaw nga!
3035. Kapag umutot ang Amerikano, "Excuse me." European, "Pardon me." Spanish, "Dispensa amigo." E kapag Filipino? "T*ng ina! Hindi ako yun! Mamatay na ang umutot! Denying ka talaga!"
3036. Pare1: Pre, tagayan mo pa ako. Nag-away kami ni misis eh. Pare2: Ha? Sinong nanalo? Pare1: Sabihin na lang natin na sa huli, nakaluhod syang lumapit sa akin. Pare2: Hahaha! Bossing ka pala. Anong sabi nya? Pare1: Lumabas ka dyan sa ilalim ng kama, duwag!!
3037. Teacher: Iha, talagang ganyan, kapag maganda, karaniwan bobo, kapag matalino, madalas, pangit, dapat matuto kang tanggapin yan. Iha: Salamat po ma'am, ang tali-talino nyo po talaga!
3038. Teacher: What's your name? Pupil: Earlyseven Strikeland po. Teacher: Fil-Am ka ba? Pupil: Hindi po. Yun po ang name ko sa English. Sa Tagalog po, Agapito Hampaslupa!
3039. I got hurt when people say bad things about you, that's why I defend you because I can't bear to see you in pain, so I tell them. Ano ba kayo? Hindi sya yung nasa sex video, mas magaling sya dyan!
3040. Sabi nila, suplada daw ako, makulit at pasaway pa daw. Sabi ko naman sa kanila, get to know me first, tapos kapag nakilala na nyo ako, ehem! Bawal ang mainlove ha! :)
3041. Ano ang nagpasikat kay Erap? Wristband. Ano ang magpapayaman kay Abalos? Broadband. Ano ang magpapabagsak kay GMA? Husband!
3042. DPWH discovered cause of flooding in Metro Manila. It's because the only pumping stations working are in the motels! Barado pa ng condoms yung mga inodoro. Hehehe.
3043. Ang pag-ibig, kahit masakit, masaya rin. Kiss dito, yakap doon. I love you dito, I miss you doon. Pero kapag nakahanap ng iba at iniwanan ka na, magiging Emperador dito, Redhorse doon! Matador dito, San Mig doon! Punyeta dito, tangna doon! Masaya, di ba? Sa huli, para kang tanga na iiyak dito, tapos, suka doon!
3044. What is the similarity between skirt and sky? Answer: Sky covers the whole population and skirt covers the source of population. Hehehe.
3045. Sabi nila, ang buhay ay puno ng pagsubok. Ang sabi ko naman, ah, ok!
3046. Nanay: Anak, bumili ka nga ng asin. Anak: Ayoko po, madilim na, takot ako! Nanay: Huwag kang matakot, kasama mo angel mo! Anak: Eh di sya na lang ang utusan mo, dala-dalawa pa kami!
3047. Namatay si Juan, napuntang impyerno. Satan: Saan mo gusto, 1st door or second door? 1st door, hanggang leeg ang tae. Juan: Ayoko dyan! Satan: Second door, hanggang tuhod ang tae at nagkakape ang mga tao. Juan: Dito na lang ako, may kape pa! (Pumasok) Sumigaw ang bantay na demonyo: "O, balik na sa dating position, tapos na ang coffee break, higa na!"
3048. In 1998, government doctors distributed condoms to Igorots in the Mountain Province for birth control. Kahapon lang, sumulat ang isa, "Pwede na bang tanggalin?!"
3049. I hate how coffee turns into an addiction and how it keeps you up all night. How it burns and makes your heart beat fast. Especially how it makes you crave for its rich and sweet promises of grains, milk and sugar. Moments later, it puts you into melancholic mood of coldness and before you realize, it has consumed you even before you have consumed it. Empty. Hollow. Bitter. Then again, you crave for another cup. Just like love. - Inday, nag-eemote sa Starbucks.
3050. Sir: Inday, wala ang Ma'am mo, dun tayo sa kwarto! Inday: What?! Are you nuts?! For your information sir, I intend to reserve my virginity for the person I truly love. If you think I'm an easy to get cheap slut, well, you're barking at the wrong tree. And will you please act like a professional because you're so eww! If I hear anymore filthy words coming from your mouth, I will not hesitate to take legal action! Sir: Leche, maarte ka! Inday: Joke lang, Sir naman, tara na sa taas! :)
Contributors:
3001-3003, 3013-3016, 3023-3025, 3028, 3036-3049: Asha (+63917898***7)
3004-3010, 3018-3022: Dudai (+63920209***2)
3011-3012, 3026-3027, 3031, 3050: Eroica
3017: Joy (+63910727***1)
3032: Nicely
3033-3034: Anonymous (+63920801***3)
3035: Precious (+88691023***4)
3002. We all are soldiers of God. So, when you feel tired, wounded, and weak, don't give up. The battle is at its peak. And in God's lead, we will always find victory.
3003. Heavy rains remind me of challenges in life. Never ask for lighter rain, just a better umbrella. Good day, enjoy life!
3004. Don't believe a word, a promise till it's done right before your eyes. But keep on believing, still a choice.
3005. To die and part is a less evil; but to part and live, there, there is the torment. - George Lansdowne
3006. As long as forever is through, I'll be over you. - Toto.
3007. Who knows what we live, and struggle, and die? Wise men write many books, in words too hard to understand. But this, the purpose of our lives, the end of all struggle,is beyond all human wisdom. - Allan Paton
3008. People takes different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they're not on your road doesn't mean they've gotten lost. - H. Jackson Brown.
3009. There is only one way to happiness, and that is to cease worrying things which are beyond the power of will. - Epictecus.
3010. One's philosophy is not best expressed in words, it is expressed in the choices one makes, and the choices we make are ultimately our responsibility. - Eleanor Roosevelt.
3011. Why would I avoid those who hate me? When I could make their lives miserable just by existing. :)
3012. The greatest trick the devil has pulled, is to convince the world that he did not exist. - Keyser Soze
3013. True friends are like mornings, you can't have them the whole day but you can be sure that they'll be there when you wake up tomorrow, next year and forever. Thanks for being one of my beautiful sunrises. ;)
3014. Have you ever thanked friends for their smiles? Their hellos? Their taps on your back? Their way of calling your name? All of the little and simplest form of love? Small things usually go unnoticed, but in reality, they're the ones that keep us going! Thank you!
3015. The miracles in our lives are simply the making of a few loving friends who care much, love for real and see us so much beyond ourselves. Have a good morning!
3016. How are you today? A message from my heart, a place where I keep special people like you. Good morning!
3017. Sometimes, you need to hold a friend's hand, not for love, but for the comfort and security it brings. I got 2 hands and if anything goes wrong, I promise you'll have them both.
3018. It ain't the things you got, it ain't the things you do. It ain't the things you're not, it's because you are you. It ain't about wordly treasure, it ain't about a piece of art, it ain't about anything you can measure, it's about what's in your heart. What is it? It's a friend, tried and true. Dude, that's what I found in you.
3019. Few will have the greatness to bend love stories itself, but each one of us can work to change a portion of our hearts, and in the total of all those acts will be written deep in our souls.
3020. Oftentimes, you use your words to soothe someone else's feelings because you know only that words could shut that someone up even when you know in your heart you don't really mean it.
3021. Love is the only way to grasp another human being in the innermost core of his personality. - Victor Frankel
3022. Don't ever think that I don't miss you, because even when you're near beside me, I just can't get enough of you. So, what do I call it when you are far apart? Feel like dying to see and hold you again.
3023. People say I'm strong because I'm numb to any pain. Actually, it's my special technique. What they don't know is that I had to break my heart a million times just to master it.
3024. If your heart gets broken, it's not a sin to cry, it's not a crime to mourn, but it's not right to ruin your own life. Because in love, you should know when to move on if there's no reason to hold on.
3025. What should really count? Is it the time you find yourself smiling thinking of that person, giggling about the moments you've had with him/her? Or the time you found yourself crying because someone makes you so happy, it melts your heart? It's just simple... be with someone who knows what they have when they have you.
3027. Life depends on the way you think. For example, read this: Mypenisinhermouth. What did you read? My pen is in her mouth. Or did your dirty mind read something else?
3028. A man found a genie who granted him 3 wishes. Genie was told to provide all things he lacked. Genie found that he had no water so he gave him water. Genie saw that he had no money, so he was given a bank. Genie then saw that he had no problem, genie gave him a wife. :)
3029. Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable. :) By Cher, Men Are From Mars.
3030. Life is easier if we are not beautiful. But since we are, life is difficult!
3031. To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot even if you don't understand her at all!
3032. Please warn your male friends to be wary of a clever scam in Megamall parking where my friend himself was a victim. Two pretty 19-year old girls will approach you and ask for a ride Once inside the car, they start making love to each other and one will move up and perform oral sex on you while the other steals your wallet. He lost his wallet on Wednesday, Friday and twice this Saturday. He's going to buy more wallets tomorrow. Hehehe.
3033. A 50-year old lady is dying of cancer, asks God to give her 25 years more and God approves. After her successful operation, she gets facelift, lipo, tummytuck at paglabas nya ng hospital, nasagasaan sya! She asks God, "Lord, bakit sabi nyo, bibigyan nyo pa ako ng 25 years para mabuhay?" God: Sorry ha, hindi kita nakilala!
3034. Pinoy coping mechanism at work! A: Magkano po ang tinola? M: 20 lang. A: May sabaw? M: Libre na ang sabaw namin. A: Kanin, meron? M: 5 lang. A: May tutong? M: Libre na. A: Sige manong, tutong at sabaw nga!
3035. Kapag umutot ang Amerikano, "Excuse me." European, "Pardon me." Spanish, "Dispensa amigo." E kapag Filipino? "T*ng ina! Hindi ako yun! Mamatay na ang umutot! Denying ka talaga!"
3036. Pare1: Pre, tagayan mo pa ako. Nag-away kami ni misis eh. Pare2: Ha? Sinong nanalo? Pare1: Sabihin na lang natin na sa huli, nakaluhod syang lumapit sa akin. Pare2: Hahaha! Bossing ka pala. Anong sabi nya? Pare1: Lumabas ka dyan sa ilalim ng kama, duwag!!
3037. Teacher: Iha, talagang ganyan, kapag maganda, karaniwan bobo, kapag matalino, madalas, pangit, dapat matuto kang tanggapin yan. Iha: Salamat po ma'am, ang tali-talino nyo po talaga!
3038. Teacher: What's your name? Pupil: Earlyseven Strikeland po. Teacher: Fil-Am ka ba? Pupil: Hindi po. Yun po ang name ko sa English. Sa Tagalog po, Agapito Hampaslupa!
3039. I got hurt when people say bad things about you, that's why I defend you because I can't bear to see you in pain, so I tell them. Ano ba kayo? Hindi sya yung nasa sex video, mas magaling sya dyan!
3040. Sabi nila, suplada daw ako, makulit at pasaway pa daw. Sabi ko naman sa kanila, get to know me first, tapos kapag nakilala na nyo ako, ehem! Bawal ang mainlove ha! :)
3041. Ano ang nagpasikat kay Erap? Wristband. Ano ang magpapayaman kay Abalos? Broadband. Ano ang magpapabagsak kay GMA? Husband!
3042. DPWH discovered cause of flooding in Metro Manila. It's because the only pumping stations working are in the motels! Barado pa ng condoms yung mga inodoro. Hehehe.
3043. Ang pag-ibig, kahit masakit, masaya rin. Kiss dito, yakap doon. I love you dito, I miss you doon. Pero kapag nakahanap ng iba at iniwanan ka na, magiging Emperador dito, Redhorse doon! Matador dito, San Mig doon! Punyeta dito, tangna doon! Masaya, di ba? Sa huli, para kang tanga na iiyak dito, tapos, suka doon!
3044. What is the similarity between skirt and sky? Answer: Sky covers the whole population and skirt covers the source of population. Hehehe.
3045. Sabi nila, ang buhay ay puno ng pagsubok. Ang sabi ko naman, ah, ok!
3046. Nanay: Anak, bumili ka nga ng asin. Anak: Ayoko po, madilim na, takot ako! Nanay: Huwag kang matakot, kasama mo angel mo! Anak: Eh di sya na lang ang utusan mo, dala-dalawa pa kami!
3047. Namatay si Juan, napuntang impyerno. Satan: Saan mo gusto, 1st door or second door? 1st door, hanggang leeg ang tae. Juan: Ayoko dyan! Satan: Second door, hanggang tuhod ang tae at nagkakape ang mga tao. Juan: Dito na lang ako, may kape pa! (Pumasok) Sumigaw ang bantay na demonyo: "O, balik na sa dating position, tapos na ang coffee break, higa na!"
3048. In 1998, government doctors distributed condoms to Igorots in the Mountain Province for birth control. Kahapon lang, sumulat ang isa, "Pwede na bang tanggalin?!"
3049. I hate how coffee turns into an addiction and how it keeps you up all night. How it burns and makes your heart beat fast. Especially how it makes you crave for its rich and sweet promises of grains, milk and sugar. Moments later, it puts you into melancholic mood of coldness and before you realize, it has consumed you even before you have consumed it. Empty. Hollow. Bitter. Then again, you crave for another cup. Just like love. - Inday, nag-eemote sa Starbucks.
3050. Sir: Inday, wala ang Ma'am mo, dun tayo sa kwarto! Inday: What?! Are you nuts?! For your information sir, I intend to reserve my virginity for the person I truly love. If you think I'm an easy to get cheap slut, well, you're barking at the wrong tree. And will you please act like a professional because you're so eww! If I hear anymore filthy words coming from your mouth, I will not hesitate to take legal action! Sir: Leche, maarte ka! Inday: Joke lang, Sir naman, tara na sa taas! :)
Contributors:
3001-3003, 3013-3016, 3023-3025, 3028, 3036-3049: Asha (+63917898***7)
3004-3010, 3018-3022: Dudai (+63920209***2)
3011-3012, 3026-3027, 3031, 3050: Eroica
3017: Joy (+63910727***1)
3032: Nicely
3033-3034: Anonymous (+63920801***3)
3035: Precious (+88691023***4)
Sep 25, 2007
text messages 2951 - 3000
2951. God hides from us the things that we are not yet ready to receive. That is why when we try to get it ourselves, we end up with the second best. Just pray and wait. Good evening!
2952. Nights are the best time to be peaceful, to plan your tomorrow, and above all, to thank God thru prayers for all His blessings. Good night and sleep well!
2953. Feel the fresh and gentle touch of the Holy Spirit and let the overflowing joy and love of God be with you today and forever. Have a nice day!
2954. Prayer lifts our hearts above the battles of life and gives us a glimpse of God's power which spells victory and hope. God bless. Good morning.
2955. God gives us a loving spirit so we can be a true person, not just gifted with a mind that can understand but with a heart that truly cares. Good morning.
2956. Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting. Keep the faith. God makes all things beautiful in His time. Good evening!
2957. Many sincere people were desired for seeking happiness because they feel that it was “selfish” or “wrong”. Happiness is not a “payoff” or a “prize” but rather a natural accompaniment, the “being” or “acting”. though it may not coincide with others’ prejudices, this doesn't mean it’s wrong.
2958. We are disturbed not by the things that happened, but by their opinion of the things that happened.
2959. There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so. – William Shakespeare
2960. I know you trust me, and I will never take it from you ever.
2961. I would rather live and love where death is king than have eternal life where love is not. - Robert G. Ingersoll
2962. When I speak about love – it is really love. If you don’t believe it, it’s not my problem anymore. – Jesse Castle Knott
2963. If sex is only what I'm up to, I won’t hold on to you this far, for the pleasure it gives, I can have it by my own. – Jesse Castle Knott
2964. If only I knew that I would be misjudged, I should have keep this love to myself and never let it shown. – Jesse Castle Knott
2965. A finely tempered nature longs to escape from the personal life into the world of objective perception and thought. – Albert Eintein
2966. Giving is the secret of a healthy life. Not necessarily money, but whatever a person has - encouragement, sympathy and understanding. – John D. Rockfeller, Jr.
2967. Next time you are troubled, remember: No matter how painful your decision is, as long as you can sleep well at night, it means that you made the right choice.
2968. Wise man said: Watch your thoughts for they become words. Choose your words for they become actions. Understand your actions for they become habits. Study your habits for they will become your character. Develop your character, for it becomes your destiny. Have a great life with a destiny of your choice!
2969. Remember: When there are rumors about you, it automatically means you're interesting. :)
2970. Once you enter this family, there's no getting out. This family comes before everything else, everything. - Tony Soprano
2971. I am the master of myself. - Napoleon Bonaparte.
2972. Morning is a wonderful blessing, either stormy or sunny, it stands for hope, giving us another start of what we called life. Good morning!
2973. A kind word doesn't cost anything, it never hurts the tongue or lips, it can accomplish much and bring out good and beautiful images out of every person.
2974. When you don't feel good right now, try sitting down and think of the things that made you feel bad but you must accept that there are so many things beyond your control, try not to be affected, just smile and think of good things. Remember, being happy has always been a matter of choice.
2975. If there's any possible consolation in the tragedy of losing someone we love very much, it's the necessary hope that perhaps it's for the best.
2976. When people walk away from you, let them go. Your destiny is never tied to anybody who leaves you. And it doesn't mean that they are bad persons, it just means that their part in the story is over.
2977. No one in this world can dictate to you where you can be happy, if you know where and what it is, go for it. Just remember: Happiness is not a destiny, it's a choice.
2978. 1. Trulalu 2. Eklavu 3. Eklavu 4. Trulalu 5. Trulalu 6. Eklavu 7. Trulalu 8. Trulalu 9. Eklavu 10. Trulalu - isa sa mga batang bading nagsasagot ng True or False sa midterm exam nila. Cuteness noh?
2979. Bakit kapag hindi nyo na alam ang gagawin nyo, laging ako na lang ang bahala? - Batman (sige na nga, with Robin minsan)
2980. Misis: Lagi na lang akong nag-aalala tuwing nag-aout of town ka. Mister: Bakit, umuuwi naman ako kaagad, ah? Misis: Yun na nga ang inaalala ko, kung umuwi ka, biglaan.
2981. The thread asked the candle: Why do you dissolve when I burn? Candle said: You're in my heart, if you suffer, I'm bound to shed tears for you. Pati kandila, umeemote na!
2982. Preso sa silya elektrika: Warden, may last request po ako. Warden: Ano yun? Preso: Hawakan nyo naman ang kamay ko. Moral support lang. O-ha! O-ha!
2983. Makabagong kasabihan: Aanhin mo ang gwapo, kung mas malandi pa sa iyo? Pakshet.
2984. Siguro nga hindi sa lahat ng oras ay aasa tayo sa mga pangarap natin. Masasaktan lang tayo. Kasi, hindi lahat ng pangarap natin, para sa atin, natutupad. Parang ako, pangarap ko lang sya, hanggang pangarap lang. Alam mo naman iba ang mundo naming mga dyosa!
2985. Tanong: Paano mo sasabihin sa isang babae na mataba sya na hindi sya mababastos? Sagot: Uhm, excuse me miss, Mang Tomas ba ang lotion mo?
2986. With the advent of the "-ber" months, signifying the coming of the joyous Christmas season, let me be the first to greet you... Regalo ko!!!
2987. Jinggom bels, jinggom bels, jinggom all the way. O daspan, electric fan, kaldero at pinggan, hey! Kumanta ka pa. Sige pa. Advance Merry Christmas! Hahaha! Hohohoho!
2988. Tanong: Sino ang pinakatangang babae na nabuhay sa sanlibutan? Sagot: Si Eba, nakita na nyang hubo't hubad si Adan, yung mansanas pa ang isinubo. Nyahaha!
2989. Donya Mary counsels Erap on her 102nd birthday: Joseph, anak, hindi mo natapos ang pag-aaral mo, pati pagkapresidente mo! Sana, matapos mo man lang jail term mo!
2990. Apo: Lola, naalala kita tuwing umuulan. Lola: Oh, bakit naman apo? Apo: Amoy lupa. Hehehehe.
2991. Texter: Hi, can you be my textmate? Inday: It depends if you can abide my heavy schedule. You see, I get up at 5am to cook for my bosses, then do my chores till after suppertime. Only then can I reply but I would be very tired already so I guess I won't be of much use as a textmate. Galing talaga ni Inday!
2992. Drunken shrimp and blue lobster meat with caviar serve with milagrosa rice (red variety) and apricot sauce. Vegetables in balsamic vinegar splashed with extra virgin olive oil. Lychee and peach salad with sour cream and cream cheese topped with lemon zests. - Baon ni Junjun sa school na inihanda ni Inday. Hehehe. Tindi talaga ni Inday!
2993. Jeepney driver: Miss, bakit kulang ang bayad mo? Sais lang ito, syete na ang pamasahe ngayon! Inday: I am currently enrolled in a 2 year vocational course in an academic institution. Therefore, I am a student and by this fact I am entitled to have the inalienable right to avail of a certain discount on my jeepney fare. This is why I provided a payment less than what you expected because it is according to the law as stated in the fare matrix. Jeepney driver: Aww!
2994. Listening to the nonsense talk about someone's life is a pathetic way of entertainment. It doesn't contribute to the good of the society. I hate character assassinators! - Reklamo ni Inday ng natsismis sya ng kapitbahay nila!
2995. The consistency was fine. But you see, it seems that the amount of sodium chloride affected the taste drastically and those actions are irreversible. I do apologize. - Nageexplain si Inday kung bakit maalat ang ulam.
2996. Nurture others with positive, truthful words, not words that hurt. It doesn't cost anything to do so. But mean what you say and say what you mean. If you cannot be generous financially, at least be generous with your words - Ang sagot ni Inday nang pinagmumura sya ng sir nya at hindi pinautang nito.
2997. I believe that my trained skills and expertise in management with the use of standard tools, and my discipline and experience will contribute significantly to the value of work that you want. My creativity, productivity and work efficiency and the high quality of outcomes I can offer will boost the work progress. - Inday sa interview ng bago nyang amo.
2998. Consul: Why do you want to go to USA? Amo: To travel and visit relatives. Consul: Denied! Consul: And you? Inday: For life is a never ending pursuit of material and social satisfaction that I tender my great intent of actualizing a transpacific journey to the land of milk and honey. An affable sanctuary where dreams become reality and a perfect habitat where souls like mine can reach the pedestal of freedom. Consul: Lifetime Multiple Entry Visa, granted! Amo, hinimatay!
2999. Overnight inaral ng amo ni Inday ang dictionary para may pangtapat na siya kay Inday. Amo: So, Inday, tell me, how do you accept the fact that you are just a mere chambermaid in this extravagant mansion? Inday: Una camarera? Eres tan pathetic. La unica razon que inscribi tu casa es porque nada esta sucediendo dentro de tu casa cuasi-agradable. Quisiera traer una poca clase en este hogar pero conjeturo que no puedo porque esta casa es fea. Amo: Nosebleed.
3000. Amo: Mula ngayon, walang magsasalita ng English. Ang sinumang magpadugo ng ilong ko at sa mga anak ko, palalayasin sa pamamahay na ito! Klaro ba? Inday: Ang mga namutawi sa inyong mga labi ay mataman ko pong iiimbak sa sulok ng aking balintataw sa kaibuturan ng aking puso, gugunamgunamin, aariing salik ng aba at payak kong kabatiran. Tatalikdan ang matayog at palalong banyagang wika manapay kakalingain, bibigkasin at sakdal timyas na sasambitin ng aking sangkalooban. Toink!
Contributors:
2951-2955, 2972-2977, 2984-2998: Asha (+63917898***7)
2956: Naysli
2857-2966: Jesse Knott (jessekno*****7@yahoo.com)
2967-2971, 2978-2983, 2999-3000: Eroica
2952. Nights are the best time to be peaceful, to plan your tomorrow, and above all, to thank God thru prayers for all His blessings. Good night and sleep well!
2953. Feel the fresh and gentle touch of the Holy Spirit and let the overflowing joy and love of God be with you today and forever. Have a nice day!
2954. Prayer lifts our hearts above the battles of life and gives us a glimpse of God's power which spells victory and hope. God bless. Good morning.
2955. God gives us a loving spirit so we can be a true person, not just gifted with a mind that can understand but with a heart that truly cares. Good morning.
2956. Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting. Keep the faith. God makes all things beautiful in His time. Good evening!
2957. Many sincere people were desired for seeking happiness because they feel that it was “selfish” or “wrong”. Happiness is not a “payoff” or a “prize” but rather a natural accompaniment, the “being” or “acting”. though it may not coincide with others’ prejudices, this doesn't mean it’s wrong.
2958. We are disturbed not by the things that happened, but by their opinion of the things that happened.
2959. There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so. – William Shakespeare
2960. I know you trust me, and I will never take it from you ever.
2961. I would rather live and love where death is king than have eternal life where love is not. - Robert G. Ingersoll
2962. When I speak about love – it is really love. If you don’t believe it, it’s not my problem anymore. – Jesse Castle Knott
2963. If sex is only what I'm up to, I won’t hold on to you this far, for the pleasure it gives, I can have it by my own. – Jesse Castle Knott
2964. If only I knew that I would be misjudged, I should have keep this love to myself and never let it shown. – Jesse Castle Knott
2965. A finely tempered nature longs to escape from the personal life into the world of objective perception and thought. – Albert Eintein
2966. Giving is the secret of a healthy life. Not necessarily money, but whatever a person has - encouragement, sympathy and understanding. – John D. Rockfeller, Jr.
2967. Next time you are troubled, remember: No matter how painful your decision is, as long as you can sleep well at night, it means that you made the right choice.
2968. Wise man said: Watch your thoughts for they become words. Choose your words for they become actions. Understand your actions for they become habits. Study your habits for they will become your character. Develop your character, for it becomes your destiny. Have a great life with a destiny of your choice!
2969. Remember: When there are rumors about you, it automatically means you're interesting. :)
2970. Once you enter this family, there's no getting out. This family comes before everything else, everything. - Tony Soprano
2971. I am the master of myself. - Napoleon Bonaparte.
2972. Morning is a wonderful blessing, either stormy or sunny, it stands for hope, giving us another start of what we called life. Good morning!
2973. A kind word doesn't cost anything, it never hurts the tongue or lips, it can accomplish much and bring out good and beautiful images out of every person.
2974. When you don't feel good right now, try sitting down and think of the things that made you feel bad but you must accept that there are so many things beyond your control, try not to be affected, just smile and think of good things. Remember, being happy has always been a matter of choice.
2975. If there's any possible consolation in the tragedy of losing someone we love very much, it's the necessary hope that perhaps it's for the best.
2977. No one in this world can dictate to you where you can be happy, if you know where and what it is, go for it. Just remember: Happiness is not a destiny, it's a choice.
2978. 1. Trulalu 2. Eklavu 3. Eklavu 4. Trulalu 5. Trulalu 6. Eklavu 7. Trulalu 8. Trulalu 9. Eklavu 10. Trulalu - isa sa mga batang bading nagsasagot ng True or False sa midterm exam nila. Cuteness noh?
2979. Bakit kapag hindi nyo na alam ang gagawin nyo, laging ako na lang ang bahala? - Batman (sige na nga, with Robin minsan)
2980. Misis: Lagi na lang akong nag-aalala tuwing nag-aout of town ka. Mister: Bakit, umuuwi naman ako kaagad, ah? Misis: Yun na nga ang inaalala ko, kung umuwi ka, biglaan.
2981. The thread asked the candle: Why do you dissolve when I burn? Candle said: You're in my heart, if you suffer, I'm bound to shed tears for you. Pati kandila, umeemote na!
2982. Preso sa silya elektrika: Warden, may last request po ako. Warden: Ano yun? Preso: Hawakan nyo naman ang kamay ko. Moral support lang. O-ha! O-ha!
2983. Makabagong kasabihan: Aanhin mo ang gwapo, kung mas malandi pa sa iyo? Pakshet.
2984. Siguro nga hindi sa lahat ng oras ay aasa tayo sa mga pangarap natin. Masasaktan lang tayo. Kasi, hindi lahat ng pangarap natin, para sa atin, natutupad. Parang ako, pangarap ko lang sya, hanggang pangarap lang. Alam mo naman iba ang mundo naming mga dyosa!
2985. Tanong: Paano mo sasabihin sa isang babae na mataba sya na hindi sya mababastos? Sagot: Uhm, excuse me miss, Mang Tomas ba ang lotion mo?
2986. With the advent of the "-ber" months, signifying the coming of the joyous Christmas season, let me be the first to greet you... Regalo ko!!!
2987. Jinggom bels, jinggom bels, jinggom all the way. O daspan, electric fan, kaldero at pinggan, hey! Kumanta ka pa. Sige pa. Advance Merry Christmas! Hahaha! Hohohoho!
2988. Tanong: Sino ang pinakatangang babae na nabuhay sa sanlibutan? Sagot: Si Eba, nakita na nyang hubo't hubad si Adan, yung mansanas pa ang isinubo. Nyahaha!
2989. Donya Mary counsels Erap on her 102nd birthday: Joseph, anak, hindi mo natapos ang pag-aaral mo, pati pagkapresidente mo! Sana, matapos mo man lang jail term mo!
2990. Apo: Lola, naalala kita tuwing umuulan. Lola: Oh, bakit naman apo? Apo: Amoy lupa. Hehehehe.
2991. Texter: Hi, can you be my textmate? Inday: It depends if you can abide my heavy schedule. You see, I get up at 5am to cook for my bosses, then do my chores till after suppertime. Only then can I reply but I would be very tired already so I guess I won't be of much use as a textmate. Galing talaga ni Inday!
2992. Drunken shrimp and blue lobster meat with caviar serve with milagrosa rice (red variety) and apricot sauce. Vegetables in balsamic vinegar splashed with extra virgin olive oil. Lychee and peach salad with sour cream and cream cheese topped with lemon zests. - Baon ni Junjun sa school na inihanda ni Inday. Hehehe. Tindi talaga ni Inday!
2993. Jeepney driver: Miss, bakit kulang ang bayad mo? Sais lang ito, syete na ang pamasahe ngayon! Inday: I am currently enrolled in a 2 year vocational course in an academic institution. Therefore, I am a student and by this fact I am entitled to have the inalienable right to avail of a certain discount on my jeepney fare. This is why I provided a payment less than what you expected because it is according to the law as stated in the fare matrix. Jeepney driver: Aww!
2994. Listening to the nonsense talk about someone's life is a pathetic way of entertainment. It doesn't contribute to the good of the society. I hate character assassinators! - Reklamo ni Inday ng natsismis sya ng kapitbahay nila!
2995. The consistency was fine. But you see, it seems that the amount of sodium chloride affected the taste drastically and those actions are irreversible. I do apologize. - Nageexplain si Inday kung bakit maalat ang ulam.
2996. Nurture others with positive, truthful words, not words that hurt. It doesn't cost anything to do so. But mean what you say and say what you mean. If you cannot be generous financially, at least be generous with your words - Ang sagot ni Inday nang pinagmumura sya ng sir nya at hindi pinautang nito.
2997. I believe that my trained skills and expertise in management with the use of standard tools, and my discipline and experience will contribute significantly to the value of work that you want. My creativity, productivity and work efficiency and the high quality of outcomes I can offer will boost the work progress. - Inday sa interview ng bago nyang amo.
2998. Consul: Why do you want to go to USA? Amo: To travel and visit relatives. Consul: Denied! Consul: And you? Inday: For life is a never ending pursuit of material and social satisfaction that I tender my great intent of actualizing a transpacific journey to the land of milk and honey. An affable sanctuary where dreams become reality and a perfect habitat where souls like mine can reach the pedestal of freedom. Consul: Lifetime Multiple Entry Visa, granted! Amo, hinimatay!
2999. Overnight inaral ng amo ni Inday ang dictionary para may pangtapat na siya kay Inday. Amo: So, Inday, tell me, how do you accept the fact that you are just a mere chambermaid in this extravagant mansion? Inday: Una camarera? Eres tan pathetic. La unica razon que inscribi tu casa es porque nada esta sucediendo dentro de tu casa cuasi-agradable. Quisiera traer una poca clase en este hogar pero conjeturo que no puedo porque esta casa es fea. Amo: Nosebleed.
3000. Amo: Mula ngayon, walang magsasalita ng English. Ang sinumang magpadugo ng ilong ko at sa mga anak ko, palalayasin sa pamamahay na ito! Klaro ba? Inday: Ang mga namutawi sa inyong mga labi ay mataman ko pong iiimbak sa sulok ng aking balintataw sa kaibuturan ng aking puso, gugunamgunamin, aariing salik ng aba at payak kong kabatiran. Tatalikdan ang matayog at palalong banyagang wika manapay kakalingain, bibigkasin at sakdal timyas na sasambitin ng aking sangkalooban. Toink!
Contributors:
2951-2955, 2972-2977, 2984-2998: Asha (+63917898***7)
2956: Naysli
2857-2966: Jesse Knott (jessekno*****7@yahoo.com)
2967-2971, 2978-2983, 2999-3000: Eroica
Sep 18, 2007
text messages 2901 - 2950
2901. The verse "Don't be afraid" appears 365 times in the Bible. Enough assurance that for each day of the year, we can trust God to face everything with Him.
2902. The God we met in good times is the same God we meet in hard times. May the Lord refresh us and give us strength as we face new challenges everyday. Good night!
2903. You are a blessed person with an important role to play in life and God is watching over you with love and concern. Be the best you can be for God's purpose. Good day!
2904. Lord, grant me the vision to see Your plans for the world. Continue to pour out Your blessings. For in everything we do, we shall praise You. Amen.
2905. Life can be happier and less stressful if we remember one simple thought: We can't have all that we desire but GOd will give us all that we deserve.
2906. Little things we give away surely comes back to us some other day, coz God never forget to give rewards to those who share their unselfish hearts. God bless you.
2907. If there is one mistake in your whole lifetime that you can tolerate, it is when you are kind even to those who are undeserving.
2908. Eternity, without it, yesterday is forgotten. Today is taken for granted and tomorrow will never come.
2909. If you are so much focused with what's left behind, you might not be able to see what lies ahead. - Chef Gusteau, Ratatouille.
2910. A good test of character: When you've done something wrong, accept/admit it and be sorry. No one has ever choked to death from swallowing his/her pride.
2911. Just think of happy things and your heart will fly on wings forever! - Peter Pan.
2912. Life will never be better without you, you're not just an ordinary friend, have seen a lot of them but nothing compares to what we have had, that's why I'm keeping you forever in my heart, today though too complicated, way beyond, for all I know, everything is temporary but I'm hanging around with you of my todays. You'll always be my bestfriend, Dude, that's forever and I mean it.
2913. Years from now, I don't know who I'm gonna be, where' I'll be in my life and what I have by then. But one thing would be certain, that you'll still be my friend wherever I'll be.
2914. Friendship is always a promise kept in the heart so when everything is unclear, just remember three things: I'm here, still here, with or without beer. :)
2915. I wish you the best of ber starting today. Bery healthy, bery happy, bery rich, bery well loved, bery kind, and most of all bery young looking always! Bery many blessings to you!
2916. Question: When is the best time to tell someone you love him/her? Answer: Before somebody else does.
2917. It's a mistery why people still fall in love after a heartbreak and risk getting rejected and hurt all over again. I guess it's the dream of finding true love or simply because life is happier when you're in love.
2918. You are part of the puzzle of someone else's life. You may never know where you fit, but others will fill the holes in their lives with pieces of you. So if you run out of reasons to live, remember that someone else's life may never be complete without you in it.
2919. One should always be in love, that's the reason one should never marry. - Ambrose Bierce
2920. The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. And that's what you've given me. That's what I'd hope to give you forever. - Noah, The Notebook.
2921. Life's questions: How old are you before it can be said you died of old age? Why did Sally sell seashells on the seashore when you can just pick them up anyway? In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section? Do bald men wash their head with soap or shampoo? Why are red buttons always the most important? Why is it when you're sleeping it's called a drool but when you're awake it's called a spit? Could someone be addicted to counseling, if so, how would you treat them? Why when people ask you, "What 3 things would you bring with you on a desert island?", no one ever replies, "A boat." Why are elderly people often called "old people" but children are never called "new people"?
2922. Doctor: Your sex operation is a success, you now have your pussy. Gay: Thanks doc! Doctor: Oh, here is you dick, since you're so ugly you will need it to f*ck yourself.
2923. Thought of the day: A friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.
2924. Great signs! 1. Gynecologist - Dr. Chua at your cervix. 2. Septic tank truck - Yesterday's meals on wheels. 3. Plumber's office - We repair what your husband fixed. 4. Tire shop - Invite us to your next blowout. 5. Electrical shop - Let us remove your shorts. 6. Maternity room door - Push, push, push! 7. Optometrist's clinic - If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.
2925. Telling a lie is a fault for a little boy, an art for a lover, an accomplishment for a bachelor, and a matter of survival for a married man.
2926. A man's wife lost interest in sex. Doctor gave him pills to give to his wife. He drops one in wife's coffee and takes one also. After 10 minutes: Wife: I need a man! Man: Me too!
2927. A man applying as security guard was interviewed: "What we ned is a person with suspicious mind, high alert, insistent, unusual sense of hearing and with killer instinct. Do you think you are qualified?" "I'm afraid not. But could I ask my wife to apply?"
2928. Businessman explaining the reason for having two or more wives: "Monopoly is always damaging while competitions improve service!"
2929. May mga taong hindi mo maintindihan. Akala mo, makulit, mabait pala. Akala mo, wala lang, caring pala. Akala mo rude, sweet pala. Mukhang ikaw, no? Pero ako pala. Hehehe.
2930. Mahirap maging perfect sa taong love mo! Nagbago ka dahil sa kanya, nagpakababa ka dahil din sa kanya, pero ang masakit, perfect ka na, iniwan ka pa!!!
2931. Man: Doctor, bakit dinugo sa first night ang asawa ko e dating GRO yan. (Ineksamin ng doktor ang misis) Doc: Wala po kayong dapat ikabahala, natuklap lang po ang kalyo!
2932. Receptionist: Pasok na sir, maraming bago ngayon, mga bata at sexy! Customer: Gusto ko, yung mature na at mataba. Receptionist: Uy, si sir, homesick na!
2933. The bear and the two men. Two men were walking in a forest when they saw a bear. One immediately ran and climbed up a tree. The second man was slow and was left behind. So, the second man pretended to be dead. The bear then came, walked around him and smelled his head. Then the bear went away. When the bear was gone, his friend came down the tree and asked, "What did the bear tell you?" He said, "Don't trust someone who leaves you in time of need or trouble." Hanep! Nagsasalita yung bear!
2934. Hindi ko alam kung anong papel ko sa buhay mo, sa pagkatao mo, o sa puso mo! Meron man o wala, gusto ko lang malaman mo, hindi ako papel, kokomban! kokombaaannn!!
2935. Pare, may dalaga dito sa amin, gustong magwork sa Japan. Pinahiram ko na nga ng pera, sinampal pa ako. Para sinabi ko lang naman na, "Ibalik mo sa akin yan kapag maluwag ka na ha!"
2936. Kung doktor ka, paano mo sasabihin sa pasyente mo na hindi na magtatagal ang buhay nya? Ganito... Makulay! Makulay! Ang buhay! Ang buhay! Makulay ang buhay sa kabilang buhay!
2937. Good morning! A cute greeting from a cute sender. Have a bright morning, cute receiver! Yan ah, patas! =)
2938. Boy: Hayop ka! Hirap na hirap akong nagtatrabaho sa sakahan mo pero sahod ko, hindi tumaas! Kung mamatay ako, sinong magpapakain sa pamilya ko, ikaw? Amo: Inglisin mo para taasan ko sahod mo! Boy: Animal you! Poor poor me to job in your farm but my salary did not climb! If I die, who will eat my family, you?
2939. DTI Inspector: Yung mga ibinebenta nyo raw na toys na made in China, marami daw lead sa pintura nito. Akong: Oo, malami led, pelo melon din silang glins at olens!
2940. Hawakan, salatin, ipasok ang daliri, hanggang 3 pwede, depende sa laki ng butas. Ipasok hanggang ilalim, haplusin pati puwet. Yan ang tamang paghugas ng baso.
2941. Minsan, sa buhay, may gusto tayong hanapin. Tagumpay? Pag-ibig? Kaibigan? Saya? Pero naisip mo ba? Ang nais mong makita sa umaga, pustahan? Ano? Cellphone, di ba? :)
2942. Try this. Mag-isip ka ng dalawang number, from 1 to 100. Huwag mo munang scroll down, ha! Tapos na? Ok, thanks! Good night! (Nagpapaantok lang!)
2943. Today's lesson: Kapag nadulas ka sa harap ng crush mo. The best palusot: "See how I fall for you?" Yun yun! Yun ang tinatawag na poise under pressure!
2944. Tahimik na nakatitig si Inday sa bote ng juice. Dahil nakasulat... Concentrate! Toink!
2945. Ederlyn: Ikaw ba ang Inday na sinasabi nila? At sino ka para itulad sa akin ang iyong kasikatan ngayong ako'y nananahimik na? Wala kang karapatan para pantayan ako! Hayop ka! Inday: My apologies, but the fact is your glory days are over my friend. I find it somewhat ridiculous, your persistence on persuading people to come to your party that never existed is beginning to get into my nerves!Damn you Ederlyn! Damn you! No one undermines Inday's intellect, b*tch! *Evil laugh* - Nag-away na sina Ederlyn at Inday.
2946. 500 ~ GLobe Plan subscription. 1800 ~ Glutathione tablet. 600 ~ Olay Total Effects. 1500 ~ Crocs flip flops. 2000 ~ For Mama. Budget in Inday sa sweldo nya. Ganda nya, noh?
2947. "Je suis triste et solitaire." (I'm sad and lonely) - Instant messaging ni Inday sa kanyang French boyfriend na one month nang hindi sumasagot sa YM at emails nya. Nakakaloka!
2948. 1. Fendi handbag. 2. Balenciaga sandals. 3. Manolo Blanich hi-heels. 4. Chanel furcoat. 5. iPod Video. 6. Motorola Razr, Dolce and Gabbana edition. 7. Sony flatscreen plasma tv. 8. Aquamarine diamond watch. 9. Louis Vuitton bag. 10. Obagi system skin care line. - Wish list ni Inday for Christmas (nakadikit sa ref ng amo nya!)
2949. I'm not extremely good looking but I have a sense of humor. I'm not breathtakingly intelligent but I'm relatively witty. I'm not insanely rich but I'm fairly kind. I'm just a simple guy with a crazy elusive ambition of meeting your acquiantance. So, hi! =) - Dodong, nakikipagtextmate kay Inday.
2950. Mere exchange of messages through these minute digital devices cannot fully express my overwhelming gratitude for getting to know such a dynamic person like you. Hopefully, one day, we can personally meet and find out that we are true individuals not hiding in this virtual facade that we call text messaging. Thanks for being my textmate. - Inday, reply nya kay Dodong!
Contributors:
2901-2908, 2913-2917, 2922-2940, 2948-2950: Asha (+63917898***7)
2909-2910, 2918-2921, 2941-2947: Eroica
2911-2912: Dudai (+63920209***2)
2902. The God we met in good times is the same God we meet in hard times. May the Lord refresh us and give us strength as we face new challenges everyday. Good night!
2903. You are a blessed person with an important role to play in life and God is watching over you with love and concern. Be the best you can be for God's purpose. Good day!
2904. Lord, grant me the vision to see Your plans for the world. Continue to pour out Your blessings. For in everything we do, we shall praise You. Amen.
2905. Life can be happier and less stressful if we remember one simple thought: We can't have all that we desire but GOd will give us all that we deserve.
2906. Little things we give away surely comes back to us some other day, coz God never forget to give rewards to those who share their unselfish hearts. God bless you.
2907. If there is one mistake in your whole lifetime that you can tolerate, it is when you are kind even to those who are undeserving.
2908. Eternity, without it, yesterday is forgotten. Today is taken for granted and tomorrow will never come.
2909. If you are so much focused with what's left behind, you might not be able to see what lies ahead. - Chef Gusteau, Ratatouille.
2910. A good test of character: When you've done something wrong, accept/admit it and be sorry. No one has ever choked to death from swallowing his/her pride.
2911. Just think of happy things and your heart will fly on wings forever! - Peter Pan.
2912. Life will never be better without you, you're not just an ordinary friend, have seen a lot of them but nothing compares to what we have had, that's why I'm keeping you forever in my heart, today though too complicated, way beyond, for all I know, everything is temporary but I'm hanging around with you of my todays. You'll always be my bestfriend, Dude, that's forever and I mean it.
2913. Years from now, I don't know who I'm gonna be, where' I'll be in my life and what I have by then. But one thing would be certain, that you'll still be my friend wherever I'll be.
2914. Friendship is always a promise kept in the heart so when everything is unclear, just remember three things: I'm here, still here, with or without beer. :)
2915. I wish you the best of ber starting today. Bery healthy, bery happy, bery rich, bery well loved, bery kind, and most of all bery young looking always! Bery many blessings to you!
2916. Question: When is the best time to tell someone you love him/her? Answer: Before somebody else does.
2917. It's a mistery why people still fall in love after a heartbreak and risk getting rejected and hurt all over again. I guess it's the dream of finding true love or simply because life is happier when you're in love.
2918. You are part of the puzzle of someone else's life. You may never know where you fit, but others will fill the holes in their lives with pieces of you. So if you run out of reasons to live, remember that someone else's life may never be complete without you in it.
2919. One should always be in love, that's the reason one should never marry. - Ambrose Bierce
2920. The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. And that's what you've given me. That's what I'd hope to give you forever. - Noah, The Notebook.
2921. Life's questions: How old are you before it can be said you died of old age? Why did Sally sell seashells on the seashore when you can just pick them up anyway? In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section? Do bald men wash their head with soap or shampoo? Why are red buttons always the most important? Why is it when you're sleeping it's called a drool but when you're awake it's called a spit? Could someone be addicted to counseling, if so, how would you treat them? Why when people ask you, "What 3 things would you bring with you on a desert island?", no one ever replies, "A boat." Why are elderly people often called "old people" but children are never called "new people"?
2922. Doctor: Your sex operation is a success, you now have your pussy. Gay: Thanks doc! Doctor: Oh, here is you dick, since you're so ugly you will need it to f*ck yourself.
2923. Thought of the day: A friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.
2924. Great signs! 1. Gynecologist - Dr. Chua at your cervix. 2. Septic tank truck - Yesterday's meals on wheels. 3. Plumber's office - We repair what your husband fixed. 4. Tire shop - Invite us to your next blowout. 5. Electrical shop - Let us remove your shorts. 6. Maternity room door - Push, push, push! 7. Optometrist's clinic - If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.
2925. Telling a lie is a fault for a little boy, an art for a lover, an accomplishment for a bachelor, and a matter of survival for a married man.
2927. A man applying as security guard was interviewed: "What we ned is a person with suspicious mind, high alert, insistent, unusual sense of hearing and with killer instinct. Do you think you are qualified?" "I'm afraid not. But could I ask my wife to apply?"
2928. Businessman explaining the reason for having two or more wives: "Monopoly is always damaging while competitions improve service!"
2929. May mga taong hindi mo maintindihan. Akala mo, makulit, mabait pala. Akala mo, wala lang, caring pala. Akala mo rude, sweet pala. Mukhang ikaw, no? Pero ako pala. Hehehe.
2930. Mahirap maging perfect sa taong love mo! Nagbago ka dahil sa kanya, nagpakababa ka dahil din sa kanya, pero ang masakit, perfect ka na, iniwan ka pa!!!
2931. Man: Doctor, bakit dinugo sa first night ang asawa ko e dating GRO yan. (Ineksamin ng doktor ang misis) Doc: Wala po kayong dapat ikabahala, natuklap lang po ang kalyo!
2932. Receptionist: Pasok na sir, maraming bago ngayon, mga bata at sexy! Customer: Gusto ko, yung mature na at mataba. Receptionist: Uy, si sir, homesick na!
2933. The bear and the two men. Two men were walking in a forest when they saw a bear. One immediately ran and climbed up a tree. The second man was slow and was left behind. So, the second man pretended to be dead. The bear then came, walked around him and smelled his head. Then the bear went away. When the bear was gone, his friend came down the tree and asked, "What did the bear tell you?" He said, "Don't trust someone who leaves you in time of need or trouble." Hanep! Nagsasalita yung bear!
2934. Hindi ko alam kung anong papel ko sa buhay mo, sa pagkatao mo, o sa puso mo! Meron man o wala, gusto ko lang malaman mo, hindi ako papel, kokomban! kokombaaannn!!
2935. Pare, may dalaga dito sa amin, gustong magwork sa Japan. Pinahiram ko na nga ng pera, sinampal pa ako. Para sinabi ko lang naman na, "Ibalik mo sa akin yan kapag maluwag ka na ha!"
2936. Kung doktor ka, paano mo sasabihin sa pasyente mo na hindi na magtatagal ang buhay nya? Ganito... Makulay! Makulay! Ang buhay! Ang buhay! Makulay ang buhay sa kabilang buhay!
2937. Good morning! A cute greeting from a cute sender. Have a bright morning, cute receiver! Yan ah, patas! =)
2938. Boy: Hayop ka! Hirap na hirap akong nagtatrabaho sa sakahan mo pero sahod ko, hindi tumaas! Kung mamatay ako, sinong magpapakain sa pamilya ko, ikaw? Amo: Inglisin mo para taasan ko sahod mo! Boy: Animal you! Poor poor me to job in your farm but my salary did not climb! If I die, who will eat my family, you?
2939. DTI Inspector: Yung mga ibinebenta nyo raw na toys na made in China, marami daw lead sa pintura nito. Akong: Oo, malami led, pelo melon din silang glins at olens!
2940. Hawakan, salatin, ipasok ang daliri, hanggang 3 pwede, depende sa laki ng butas. Ipasok hanggang ilalim, haplusin pati puwet. Yan ang tamang paghugas ng baso.
2941. Minsan, sa buhay, may gusto tayong hanapin. Tagumpay? Pag-ibig? Kaibigan? Saya? Pero naisip mo ba? Ang nais mong makita sa umaga, pustahan? Ano? Cellphone, di ba? :)
2942. Try this. Mag-isip ka ng dalawang number, from 1 to 100. Huwag mo munang scroll down, ha! Tapos na? Ok, thanks! Good night! (Nagpapaantok lang!)
2943. Today's lesson: Kapag nadulas ka sa harap ng crush mo. The best palusot: "See how I fall for you?" Yun yun! Yun ang tinatawag na poise under pressure!
2944. Tahimik na nakatitig si Inday sa bote ng juice. Dahil nakasulat... Concentrate! Toink!
2945. Ederlyn: Ikaw ba ang Inday na sinasabi nila? At sino ka para itulad sa akin ang iyong kasikatan ngayong ako'y nananahimik na? Wala kang karapatan para pantayan ako! Hayop ka! Inday: My apologies, but the fact is your glory days are over my friend. I find it somewhat ridiculous, your persistence on persuading people to come to your party that never existed is beginning to get into my nerves!Damn you Ederlyn! Damn you! No one undermines Inday's intellect, b*tch! *Evil laugh* - Nag-away na sina Ederlyn at Inday.
2946. 500 ~ GLobe Plan subscription. 1800 ~ Glutathione tablet. 600 ~ Olay Total Effects. 1500 ~ Crocs flip flops. 2000 ~ For Mama. Budget in Inday sa sweldo nya. Ganda nya, noh?
2947. "Je suis triste et solitaire." (I'm sad and lonely) - Instant messaging ni Inday sa kanyang French boyfriend na one month nang hindi sumasagot sa YM at emails nya. Nakakaloka!
2948. 1. Fendi handbag. 2. Balenciaga sandals. 3. Manolo Blanich hi-heels. 4. Chanel furcoat. 5. iPod Video. 6. Motorola Razr, Dolce and Gabbana edition. 7. Sony flatscreen plasma tv. 8. Aquamarine diamond watch. 9. Louis Vuitton bag. 10. Obagi system skin care line. - Wish list ni Inday for Christmas (nakadikit sa ref ng amo nya!)
2949. I'm not extremely good looking but I have a sense of humor. I'm not breathtakingly intelligent but I'm relatively witty. I'm not insanely rich but I'm fairly kind. I'm just a simple guy with a crazy elusive ambition of meeting your acquiantance. So, hi! =) - Dodong, nakikipagtextmate kay Inday.
2950. Mere exchange of messages through these minute digital devices cannot fully express my overwhelming gratitude for getting to know such a dynamic person like you. Hopefully, one day, we can personally meet and find out that we are true individuals not hiding in this virtual facade that we call text messaging. Thanks for being my textmate. - Inday, reply nya kay Dodong!
Contributors:
2901-2908, 2913-2917, 2922-2940, 2948-2950: Asha (+63917898***7)
2909-2910, 2918-2921, 2941-2947: Eroica
2911-2912: Dudai (+63920209***2)
Sep 4, 2007
text messages 2851 - 2900
2851. A life filled with love must have some thorns, but a life empty of love will never have roses.
2852. Do not ask the Lord to guide your steps if you are not willing to move your feet.
2853. Those who gaze at giants live like grasshoppers; those who gaze at God live like giants. God bless.
2854. Measuring life by what others do to you may disappoint you. But measuring life by what you do for others will add more meaning to your life. Good morning!
2855. In life, if you are intelligent, you are admired. If you are prominent, you are envied. If you are powerful, you are feared. But if you are blessed with a good heart, you are remembered. God bless!
2856. When people accuse us of lying, don't get too affected because we know we never lie, we just don't tell them everything.
2857. Blessings are not something we have to ask for, they are already there, all we have to do is count them and thank the Giver everyday. Good night!
2858. Smile increases value of face. Anger spoils beauty of soul. Faith is force of life. Confidence is companion of success. So, keep smiling, cute child of God. Take care always!
2859. Be grateful that you don't have everything you want. That means you have the opportunity to be happier tomorrow than you are today. Sleep sweetly. Good night!
2860. What you don't know will not hurt you, it's what you suspect that f*cks everything up!
2861. Never let the things you want make you forget the things you already have.
2862. A jewel of a friend is like a simple calculator. Someone who adds confort, subtracts fear, divides blessings and multiplies joy. Take care and God bless.
2863. True friends always stand behind you during your bad times. Check your marriage album. All your friends were standing right behind you!
2864. People are amazing when they are nice, they are wonderful when they are true. But do you know that they are a blessing when they are like you?! Good morning!
2865. To boys from cupid: Never leave the girl that destiny picked for you. Truly, distance makes the heart grow fonder but too much will instead make you wander. Always make your presence felt for all she needs is emotional assurance. There is one girl who is meant to catch my arrow for you and nothing can change that, not time nor circumstance.
2866. To girls from cupid: A man's heart is as fragile as a butterfly's wing. Never hold it too tightly for in time, he will rest right on the palm of your hands.
2867. A man will try to seduce every girl except the one he loves, but a nice girl will not be seduced by any man except the man she loves.
2868. Half my life is over and I have nothing to show for it. Nothing. I'm a thumbprint on the window of a skyscraper. I'm a smudge of excrement on a tissue surging out to sea with a million tons of raw sewage. - from the movie Sideways.
2869. Don't make fun of girls around my eyes for it echoes toward my ears; and that my mind narrows on that state; for my imagination can ruin everything; I mean everything!
2870. Teacher: You've been absent with the same excuse. Your lolo died 4 times in 4 months! Now, what is your excuse? Student: My lola is getting married to my 5th lolo!
2871. Quote of the day: For every girl with a broken heart, there's always a boy with a scotch tape.
2872. Love can move all mountains. Love can clean dark gray clouds in the sky. Love can give colors where there are none. And love can remove all underwear! Hehehe.
2873. Mr1: Whenever my wife needs money, she calls me "handsome." Mr2: Really? Mr1: Yes, "Hand some money over!"
2874. Pregnant stewardess applied for leave of absence. Boss: Why? Stewardess: It's sort of an accident. Boss: Was it job related? Stewardess: Yes, Pilot-error.
2875. Definition of wife: Someone who'll stand by you through all the troubles which you wouldn't have had if you had stayed single.
2876. Did you hear about the new type of Viagra, Viagra Lite? It's for people who only want to masturbate! Hehehe.
2877. Hindi ko hinihiling na manatili ka sa akin habang buhay. Manatili ka hangga't gusto mo, walang bakit, walang paano, walang pero, walang pangako. Basta manatili ka, masaya na ako!
2878. Kapag dumating ang araw na naramdaman mong dalawa ang mahal mo, huwag ka nang mamili pa. Doon ka na lang sa pangalawa. Bakit? Kasi, hindi ka naman magmamahal ng iba kung talagang mahal mo yung una eh.
2879. Mahilig ako sa music. Ganda sa pakiramdam, nakakagaan ng problema, nakakapagpalakas ng loob. Pero alam mo kung bakit gustong gusto ko ito? Kasi naalala kita. Sa akin kasi, isa ka sa pinakamagandang kanta.
2880. Let us see if I can still recall the alphabet. A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T V W X Y Z. Ooops! I miss U!
2881. Valer kuberch, kahit jutay, ang julamantrax donchi ay anek-anek. Nyongkamas at nutring, nyogarilyas at kipay, nyitaw, nyotaw, jutani. Kundol, jutola, jupot, jolabastrax, at mega join-join pa, jobanox nyustasa, nyubuyax, nyomatis, nyowang at luyax, and around the keme ay fullness ng linga! - Bahay Kubo, Gay version.
2882. Girl: Itay, nagbold po ako sa magazine. Tingnan nyo po ang picture ko sa page 10. Itay: Anak! Sa palagay mo ba, may mas nakakahiya pa dito?! Girl: Meron pa po itay! Tingnan nyo sa page 16, si Inay!
2883. Bob: Nakakamagkano ka sa isang araw? Pulubi: 200 na ang pinakamababa. Bob: Hindi na rin masama, no? Anong mabibili mo nyan? Pulubi: Pwede na ito sa isang caramel frap cream-based venti tsaka isang cinnamon swirl sa Starbucks.
2884. The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits. - Albert Einstein.
2885. The word "woman" has "man" in it. The pronoun "mrs" has "mr" in it. The noun "female" has "male" in it. Another pronoun "she" has "he" in it. Even the French "madam" has "adam" in it. It is therefore no wonder nga, under ang mga lalake sa mga babae! Wahaha!
2886. Do you know why they made beer taste bitter? So one would take time to drink, more time to talk. It's the time spent together, not the beer! Kaya masarap mag-inuman!
2887. May isang pari, nag-illegal parking. Nag-iwan sya ng note sa car: "Pari ako. Walang maparkingan. Please, huwag mo akong tiketan. Forgive my trespasses." Pagbalik nya, may ticket at note sa car nya: "Pulis ako. Kung hindi kita titiketan, magkakasala ako. Lead me not into temptation. Pero kung mag-iipit ka ng pera sa lisensya mo, baka pwede na. Give us this day our daily bread."
2888. Mom with her son saw a man walking. Son: Ma, tingnan mo sya, sakang! Hahaha! Mom scolded her son and decided he needed to change his manners and choice of words. She enrolled him in a Shakespeare's class. When they saw the man again: Son: Hark! What manner of men are this, who weareth their legs in parenthesis?!
2889. Kadalasan, ibinabase ng mga girls sa hitsura kung mamahalin ang isang guy. Pero hindi dapat ganun! Hindi naman sa mukha nakikita yun eh. Kundi sa loob. Sa loob ng brief! Yun yun eh! Hahaha!
2890. Ano ang tawag sa taong walang baga? Wala lung! Nyahahaha! Corny!
2891. No classes/work until Friday. Two super typhoon are expected to hit the country tomorrow. - PAGASA ng mga tinatamad! Hehehe. Pass it!
2892. Question: Bakit laging present tense ang "I can think?" Answer: Kasi, kung "I can thought," bastos ang dating, di ba?
2893. Ito, sure na malupit. Guy: Miss, ipinaglihi ka ba sa inodoro? Gal: Bakit? Guy: Kasi, ako, ipinaglihi sa tae. Nung nakita kita, hindi ko mapigilang mahulog!!!
2894. Babae at lalaki, nagkasalubong, matagal nagkatitigan. Babae: Bakit mo ako tinititigan? Ano ang iniisip mo sa akin? Lalake: Katulad din ng iniisip mo sa akin. Babae: Bastos! =)
2895. Apo ni Erap: Lolo, may assignment kami, find the least common denominator daw. Erap: Ha? Nung elementary ako, assignment na namin yan! Hindi pa ba yan nahahanap?!
2896. Sometimes, people choose to leave not because of selfish reasons, but because they just know that things will get worse if they will stay. Leaving can be a tough act, and it's harder when people can hardly understand you for doing so. - Comment ni Inday sa pag-alis ni Angel Locsin sa GMA 7.
2897. Amo: Inday, bumili ka nga ng mga isda. Ay, oo nga pala, inglesera ka na ngayon. Would you please buy many fishes for this week's meals? Inday: Judging by your statement, I believe you meant a variety of fish. The term "fishes" although rarely used, connotes a plethora of different kinds of the said gilled aquatic creatures. But the more pressing questions before I go to the wet market would be: what type of fish? Fillet or not? Lufet!
2898. Amo: Inday! Bakit may bukol si Junior? Inday: Compromising safety with useless aesthetics, the not-so-well engineered architectural design of our kitchen lavatory inexorably affected the boy’s cranium with a slight boil at the left temple lobe near the auditory organ. Amo: (nosebleed!)
2899. Slap the face of that crazy bitch! You must show to her that regardless of the class we belong in the society, respect should not be put at risk! Angelika is nothing but an opportunist, heartless devila! I damn hate her! Duh! - Inday, watching Marimar.
2900. Love - a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart that weakens the brain, causes the eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker! - Inday, gumagawa ng blog nya sa Friendster! Taray talaga!
Contributors:
2851-2858, 2863-2866, 2870-2876, 2885-2897: Asha (+63917898***7)
2859-2861, 2878, 2881-2884, 2898-2900: Eroica
2862: Anonymous (+63920801***3)
2867: Starfish
2868: Anonymous (+63917627***7)
2869: Anonymous (+63920209***2)
2877: Anonymous (+63920240***0)
2879-2880: Anonymous (+63919615***4)
2852. Do not ask the Lord to guide your steps if you are not willing to move your feet.
2853. Those who gaze at giants live like grasshoppers; those who gaze at God live like giants. God bless.
2854. Measuring life by what others do to you may disappoint you. But measuring life by what you do for others will add more meaning to your life. Good morning!
2855. In life, if you are intelligent, you are admired. If you are prominent, you are envied. If you are powerful, you are feared. But if you are blessed with a good heart, you are remembered. God bless!
2856. When people accuse us of lying, don't get too affected because we know we never lie, we just don't tell them everything.
2857. Blessings are not something we have to ask for, they are already there, all we have to do is count them and thank the Giver everyday. Good night!
2858. Smile increases value of face. Anger spoils beauty of soul. Faith is force of life. Confidence is companion of success. So, keep smiling, cute child of God. Take care always!
2859. Be grateful that you don't have everything you want. That means you have the opportunity to be happier tomorrow than you are today. Sleep sweetly. Good night!
2860. What you don't know will not hurt you, it's what you suspect that f*cks everything up!
2861. Never let the things you want make you forget the things you already have.
2862. A jewel of a friend is like a simple calculator. Someone who adds confort, subtracts fear, divides blessings and multiplies joy. Take care and God bless.
2863. True friends always stand behind you during your bad times. Check your marriage album. All your friends were standing right behind you!
2864. People are amazing when they are nice, they are wonderful when they are true. But do you know that they are a blessing when they are like you?! Good morning!
2865. To boys from cupid: Never leave the girl that destiny picked for you. Truly, distance makes the heart grow fonder but too much will instead make you wander. Always make your presence felt for all she needs is emotional assurance. There is one girl who is meant to catch my arrow for you and nothing can change that, not time nor circumstance.
2866. To girls from cupid: A man's heart is as fragile as a butterfly's wing. Never hold it too tightly for in time, he will rest right on the palm of your hands.
2867. A man will try to seduce every girl except the one he loves, but a nice girl will not be seduced by any man except the man she loves.
2868. Half my life is over and I have nothing to show for it. Nothing. I'm a thumbprint on the window of a skyscraper. I'm a smudge of excrement on a tissue surging out to sea with a million tons of raw sewage. - from the movie Sideways.
2869. Don't make fun of girls around my eyes for it echoes toward my ears; and that my mind narrows on that state; for my imagination can ruin everything; I mean everything!
2870. Teacher: You've been absent with the same excuse. Your lolo died 4 times in 4 months! Now, what is your excuse? Student: My lola is getting married to my 5th lolo!
2871. Quote of the day: For every girl with a broken heart, there's always a boy with a scotch tape.
2872. Love can move all mountains. Love can clean dark gray clouds in the sky. Love can give colors where there are none. And love can remove all underwear! Hehehe.
2873. Mr1: Whenever my wife needs money, she calls me "handsome." Mr2: Really? Mr1: Yes, "Hand some money over!"
2874. Pregnant stewardess applied for leave of absence. Boss: Why? Stewardess: It's sort of an accident. Boss: Was it job related? Stewardess: Yes, Pilot-error.
2875. Definition of wife: Someone who'll stand by you through all the troubles which you wouldn't have had if you had stayed single.
2877. Hindi ko hinihiling na manatili ka sa akin habang buhay. Manatili ka hangga't gusto mo, walang bakit, walang paano, walang pero, walang pangako. Basta manatili ka, masaya na ako!
2878. Kapag dumating ang araw na naramdaman mong dalawa ang mahal mo, huwag ka nang mamili pa. Doon ka na lang sa pangalawa. Bakit? Kasi, hindi ka naman magmamahal ng iba kung talagang mahal mo yung una eh.
2879. Mahilig ako sa music. Ganda sa pakiramdam, nakakagaan ng problema, nakakapagpalakas ng loob. Pero alam mo kung bakit gustong gusto ko ito? Kasi naalala kita. Sa akin kasi, isa ka sa pinakamagandang kanta.
2880. Let us see if I can still recall the alphabet. A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T V W X Y Z. Ooops! I miss U!
2881. Valer kuberch, kahit jutay, ang julamantrax donchi ay anek-anek. Nyongkamas at nutring, nyogarilyas at kipay, nyitaw, nyotaw, jutani. Kundol, jutola, jupot, jolabastrax, at mega join-join pa, jobanox nyustasa, nyubuyax, nyomatis, nyowang at luyax, and around the keme ay fullness ng linga! - Bahay Kubo, Gay version.
2882. Girl: Itay, nagbold po ako sa magazine. Tingnan nyo po ang picture ko sa page 10. Itay: Anak! Sa palagay mo ba, may mas nakakahiya pa dito?! Girl: Meron pa po itay! Tingnan nyo sa page 16, si Inay!
2883. Bob: Nakakamagkano ka sa isang araw? Pulubi: 200 na ang pinakamababa. Bob: Hindi na rin masama, no? Anong mabibili mo nyan? Pulubi: Pwede na ito sa isang caramel frap cream-based venti tsaka isang cinnamon swirl sa Starbucks.
2884. The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits. - Albert Einstein.
2885. The word "woman" has "man" in it. The pronoun "mrs" has "mr" in it. The noun "female" has "male" in it. Another pronoun "she" has "he" in it. Even the French "madam" has "adam" in it. It is therefore no wonder nga, under ang mga lalake sa mga babae! Wahaha!
2886. Do you know why they made beer taste bitter? So one would take time to drink, more time to talk. It's the time spent together, not the beer! Kaya masarap mag-inuman!
2887. May isang pari, nag-illegal parking. Nag-iwan sya ng note sa car: "Pari ako. Walang maparkingan. Please, huwag mo akong tiketan. Forgive my trespasses." Pagbalik nya, may ticket at note sa car nya: "Pulis ako. Kung hindi kita titiketan, magkakasala ako. Lead me not into temptation. Pero kung mag-iipit ka ng pera sa lisensya mo, baka pwede na. Give us this day our daily bread."
2888. Mom with her son saw a man walking. Son: Ma, tingnan mo sya, sakang! Hahaha! Mom scolded her son and decided he needed to change his manners and choice of words. She enrolled him in a Shakespeare's class. When they saw the man again: Son: Hark! What manner of men are this, who weareth their legs in parenthesis?!
2889. Kadalasan, ibinabase ng mga girls sa hitsura kung mamahalin ang isang guy. Pero hindi dapat ganun! Hindi naman sa mukha nakikita yun eh. Kundi sa loob. Sa loob ng brief! Yun yun eh! Hahaha!
2890. Ano ang tawag sa taong walang baga? Wala lung! Nyahahaha! Corny!
2891. No classes/work until Friday. Two super typhoon are expected to hit the country tomorrow. - PAGASA ng mga tinatamad! Hehehe. Pass it!
2892. Question: Bakit laging present tense ang "I can think?" Answer: Kasi, kung "I can thought," bastos ang dating, di ba?
2893. Ito, sure na malupit. Guy: Miss, ipinaglihi ka ba sa inodoro? Gal: Bakit? Guy: Kasi, ako, ipinaglihi sa tae. Nung nakita kita, hindi ko mapigilang mahulog!!!
2894. Babae at lalaki, nagkasalubong, matagal nagkatitigan. Babae: Bakit mo ako tinititigan? Ano ang iniisip mo sa akin? Lalake: Katulad din ng iniisip mo sa akin. Babae: Bastos! =)
2895. Apo ni Erap: Lolo, may assignment kami, find the least common denominator daw. Erap: Ha? Nung elementary ako, assignment na namin yan! Hindi pa ba yan nahahanap?!
2896. Sometimes, people choose to leave not because of selfish reasons, but because they just know that things will get worse if they will stay. Leaving can be a tough act, and it's harder when people can hardly understand you for doing so. - Comment ni Inday sa pag-alis ni Angel Locsin sa GMA 7.
2897. Amo: Inday, bumili ka nga ng mga isda. Ay, oo nga pala, inglesera ka na ngayon. Would you please buy many fishes for this week's meals? Inday: Judging by your statement, I believe you meant a variety of fish. The term "fishes" although rarely used, connotes a plethora of different kinds of the said gilled aquatic creatures. But the more pressing questions before I go to the wet market would be: what type of fish? Fillet or not? Lufet!
2898. Amo: Inday! Bakit may bukol si Junior? Inday: Compromising safety with useless aesthetics, the not-so-well engineered architectural design of our kitchen lavatory inexorably affected the boy’s cranium with a slight boil at the left temple lobe near the auditory organ. Amo: (nosebleed!)
2899. Slap the face of that crazy bitch! You must show to her that regardless of the class we belong in the society, respect should not be put at risk! Angelika is nothing but an opportunist, heartless devila! I damn hate her! Duh! - Inday, watching Marimar.
2900. Love - a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart that weakens the brain, causes the eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker! - Inday, gumagawa ng blog nya sa Friendster! Taray talaga!
Contributors:
2851-2858, 2863-2866, 2870-2876, 2885-2897: Asha (+63917898***7)
2859-2861, 2878, 2881-2884, 2898-2900: Eroica
2862: Anonymous (+63920801***3)
2867: Starfish
2868: Anonymous (+63917627***7)
2869: Anonymous (+63920209***2)
2877: Anonymous (+63920240***0)
2879-2880: Anonymous (+63919615***4)
Aug 27, 2007
text messages 2801 - 2850
2801. You are part of a puzzle of someone else's life. You may never know where you fit but remember that someone else's life may never be complete without you in it. Have a blessed day!
2802. Whatever gives you laughter, do it more often because it will bring lightness to your heart, energy for your body and wonders for your soul. :)
2803. Glory isn't how high you jump over others nor how fast you run to the finish line but it is how often you stop to help people you meet the way along in life. Good night!
2804. Clever is when you believe only half of what you hear. Brilliant is when you know which half to believe.
2805. GOd understands we are not strong all the time. He knows that sometimes, all we can do is rest in His arms as He can take us through the journey of this life. Good morning!
2806. The heart remembers all special moments when goodness made a difference. May the love you shared with others return to you in countless ways. Take care!
2807. God always repays caring acts. It may not be with money or goods, more often He repays with happiness, health, friendship and love. Happy weekend!
2808. Don't simply thank God for the many blessings you have received. Also thank Him for He has chosen you to be a special blessing to others. Good night!
2809. Never be afraid of giving your best; in work, in life and in love. For it always be the ultimate gauge of satisfaction even if you fail.
2810. One cannot question the existence of feelings. They are there, raw and undeniable, but one can choose not to nurture what is felt, yet no matter what they say, what has been felt will always be more honest than what was chosen. Hence, true realities are not built by the mind but by the heart.
2811. Life becomes wonderful even if there are struggles and difficulties because we have a God so loving and inspiring who heals the pain and keep us going strong. Good morning!
2812. I've never been brave in cupid's eyes. I tend to hide what I really feel, pretend to be fine despite the pain deep within. Now, I've realized, nobody has the right to hurt me unless I let them take away my happiness.
2813. Blessings are not something we have to ask for. They are already there, all we have to do is count them and thank the giver everyday. Have a blessed Sunday!
2814. Blessings often sneak through a door you didn't know was left open. Every exit is an entrance to another phase of life. Wish you more doors for a blessed life. Good evening!
2815. In life, you may feel tired of fighting for the same reason everyday. You may feel that everyone is moving so fast leaving you far behind and you may feel that there is no point of moving on. There's no certainty in life. It's not how fast you get there. It's on how you played the game. Put in mind that at times it is better to be like a turtle who patiently moves and enjoys every step of the way rather than a rabbit who runs so fast and missing every simple single detail in life. Good morning!
2816. Don't say you love someone unless you mean it. Because they might do something crazy like believing it.
2817. Life's little instructions: 1. Never tell a person who's experiencing deep sorrow, "I know how you feel." You don't. 2. Never risk what you can't afford to lose. 3. Once a year, go somewhere you've never been before. 4. Remember that the formula for great love is communication plus respect. 5. When declaring your rights, don't forget your responsibilities. 6. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a stroke of good luck.
2818. Who's talking? During courtship, man talks, woman listens. Once married, wife talks, husband listens. After some years, both husband and wife talk, neighbors listen.
2819. Three contractors were asked to quote for repair of the Whitehouse gate: American contractor: I'll charge $900, $500 for labor, $300 for materials and $100 for me. Mexican: I'll charge $700, $400 for labor, $200 for materials and $100 for me. Filipino: I'll charge $2700. Whitehouse employee: Why so expensive? Filipino: $1000 for me, $1000 for you and $700 for the Mexican to do the job. Whitehouse employee: Hired! When can you start?
2820. Before computers, memory was something you lost with age; an application was for a job; a program was a tv show; a cursor used profanities; a keyboard was a piano; a web was a spider's home; a virus was the flu; a hard drive was a long trip on the road; a mouse pad was where a mouse live and a 3-inch floppy is something a man just hope nobody ever found out.
2821. Seven men where standing naked in a row with erected penises. A passserby saw them and asked, "Are you advertising for condom?" They said, "No, we are posing for 7-Up!"
2822. Husband to hotel manager. Come, hurry, my wife wants to jump out of the window. Manager: What can I do about that, sir? Husband: Idiot! The window won't open!
2823. You know you're getting old if you have become a multi-tasker. You can laugh, cough, fart, and pee all at the same time.
2824. Question. Why are hurricanes normally named after women? Answer: Because when they come, they are wild and wet but when they go, they take your house and car with them.
2825. A rookie pilot was about to land his plane. To ease his tension, he joked the tower controller, "Guess who?" Controller turned off the runway lights and said, "Guess where?"
2826. Why in couple photos men are on left side and women on the right? Because in life's balance sheet, assets are on right side and liabilities are on left.
2827. Life is too short to make it dull and boring. So strive for the best to make it worth living. Dahil makulay ang buhay sa sinabawang gulay! Have a makulay week!
2828. Make cool lie. Make cool lie ang buhay. Make cool lie ang buhay sa sinabawang gulay!
2829. Ang taong bolero, masarap ka text. Ang taong tahimik, makulit sa text. Ang taong two timer, sweet sa text. Ang taong stick to one, matipid sa text. Ang taong pretty, eto, patext-text!
2830. Question. Ano ang pinakamasakit na maramdaman kung matanda na tayo? Sagot: Yung paggising mo, tapos pagtingin mo sa tagiliran mo, matanda din ang iyong katabi! Hahaha!
2831. Husband: Darling, nakakahalata ako na puro made in China ang ipinapakain mo sa akin. Wife: Iniisip ko kasi na kapag namatay ka, hindi na kita ipaeembalsamo!
2832. Class: Ma'am, ang baho po dito, may umutot! Ma'am: Ok, class. Sino man ang umutot, bibigyan ko ng 95 na grade. Pedro: Ma'am ako po. 100 nyo na Ma'am! Natae din kasi ako!
2833. Noon. Anak: Gusto ko na pong magbuntis. Nanay: Hindi pwede anak, kailangang mag-asawa ka muna bago ka magbuntis. Ngayon: Anak: Gusto ko na pong mag-asawa. Nanay: Bakit, buntis ka na ba?
2834. Elementary life: Todo aral, no syota, puro laro. High School life: Konting aral, patagong syota, bawas laro. College life: Walang aral, sabay-sabay syota, iba na ang laro.
2835. Titser: Bakit ka nalate? Bugoy: Nawalan ho kasi ng 500 yung lalaki. Titser: Tinulungan mo sya na hanapin ito? Bugoy: Hindi po. Tinapakan ko hanggang umalis sya.
2836. Question. Bakit masasabing pinakaswerte si Adan sa lahat ng lalake? Answer: Bukod sa nasa paraiso na sya, may asawa pa sya at walang byenan!
2837. Musta ka na po? Miss na po talaga kita. Hope everything is ok. Kapag medyo maluwag ako, bibisita ako dyan ha? Ok lang ba sa iyo? Dyan ka pa rin ba sa mental? Ano nga ba room number mo? Hehehe.
2838. "Sa iyo lang umiikot ang mundo ko." May tao na bang nakapagsabi sa iyo nyan? Puwes, niloloko ka nya! Ano ka? Solar system?
2839. Alam mo, naikwento kita sa puntod ni lola. Sabi ko, ikaw yung pinakamabait kong katext. Aba, akalain mo, sumagot. Hayaan mo apo, dadalawin ko sya ngayong gabi!
2840. Hindi kaya nainsulto si Pacquiao doon sa commercial ng San Miguel? Kasi, di ba, sabi sa kanya ni Morales, "Palakang katulad mo, Manny!"
2841. Jinggoy: Sayang ako na sana ang chairman ng Blue Ribbon committee. Ibinigay pa kay Cayetano. Erap: Hingin mo na lang ang Red Ribbon committee, masarap, laging busog ka pa.
2842. 3:00AM. Lasing kumakatok: Pare, tulong, patulak naman. Pare, naawa: Sige, sandali lang. Nagbihis si pare at lumabas. Saan ka? Lasing: Dito sa swing, patulak naman.
2843. Nagluluto ang mag-ama ng tanghalian. Ama: Ilang sili ang inilagay mo sa karne, anak. Anak: Labing lima, tay. Ama: O sige, gawin mo nang beinte, tapos kainin mo mag-isa, hayop ka!
2844. It hurts so much to be rejected by someone you really love but believe me, it hurts 10x more kung nakahugas ka na nang kamay, tapos, hindi ka pala kasali sa kainan.
2845. Anak: Ma, si kuya, nagbigti po sa banyo! Mama: Ha? Tumakbo patungong CR. Mama: Punyeta ka, huwag kang magbibiro ng ganyan! Anak: Hehehehe. Joke! Sa kwarto po sya nagbigti!
2846. May 7 frogs sa 1 box. Sa box, may 23 pairs na pato and 1 pusa. Ang isang pato ay nakakain ng 56 na suso. Tapos, may 5 langgam. Relax, don't worry. Walang tanong, hi lang!
2847. May isang bata na nagtanong sa tatay nya. Bata: Sino pong mas masarap, si nanay o si Inday? Tatay: Syempre, si Inday. Bata: Hindi naman eh, sabi nung driver natin, si nanay daw eh!
2848. Nangumpisal si Kulas sa mga kasalanang nagawa nya. Pari: Anak, hindi ka patatawarin. Kulas: Ha? Bakit father? Pari: Kasi, may kasalanan ka pa na hindi mo pa binabanggit. Kulas: Ano po yun father? Pari: Ikaw ba ang kumuha ng perang donasyon sa altar? Kulas: Ano po father? Pari: Ikaw ba ang kumuha ng donasyon sa may altar? Kulas: Hindi ko talaga marinig, father. Gusto mo, palit tayo ng pwesto? Nagpalit sila ng pwesto. Pari: Sige, magtanong ka. Kulas: Ikaw ba ang nakabuntis kay Ana na labandera? Pari: Ay, totoo nga, hindi ko nga marinig dito!
2849. Bobokesh ang floweret, jojosok ang reynabels. Chochorva ng chacha, chenes eklavush. - Mga batang bading na naglalaro ng bubuka ang bulaklak.
2850. Man1: Away kami ni misis. Naghistorical sya. Man2: Pare, baka ang ibig mong sabihin ay naghysterical. Man1: Hindi, historical, kasi inungkat lahat ng kasalanan ko.
Contributors:
2801-2815, 2818-2819, 2821-2826, 2830-2845, 2847-2850: Asha (+63917898***7)
2816-2817, 2820, 2829: Eroica
2827, 2846: Anonymous (+63920801***3)
2828: Tekla
2802. Whatever gives you laughter, do it more often because it will bring lightness to your heart, energy for your body and wonders for your soul. :)
2803. Glory isn't how high you jump over others nor how fast you run to the finish line but it is how often you stop to help people you meet the way along in life. Good night!
2804. Clever is when you believe only half of what you hear. Brilliant is when you know which half to believe.
2805. GOd understands we are not strong all the time. He knows that sometimes, all we can do is rest in His arms as He can take us through the journey of this life. Good morning!
2806. The heart remembers all special moments when goodness made a difference. May the love you shared with others return to you in countless ways. Take care!
2807. God always repays caring acts. It may not be with money or goods, more often He repays with happiness, health, friendship and love. Happy weekend!
2808. Don't simply thank God for the many blessings you have received. Also thank Him for He has chosen you to be a special blessing to others. Good night!
2809. Never be afraid of giving your best; in work, in life and in love. For it always be the ultimate gauge of satisfaction even if you fail.
2810. One cannot question the existence of feelings. They are there, raw and undeniable, but one can choose not to nurture what is felt, yet no matter what they say, what has been felt will always be more honest than what was chosen. Hence, true realities are not built by the mind but by the heart.
2811. Life becomes wonderful even if there are struggles and difficulties because we have a God so loving and inspiring who heals the pain and keep us going strong. Good morning!
2812. I've never been brave in cupid's eyes. I tend to hide what I really feel, pretend to be fine despite the pain deep within. Now, I've realized, nobody has the right to hurt me unless I let them take away my happiness.
2813. Blessings are not something we have to ask for. They are already there, all we have to do is count them and thank the giver everyday. Have a blessed Sunday!
2814. Blessings often sneak through a door you didn't know was left open. Every exit is an entrance to another phase of life. Wish you more doors for a blessed life. Good evening!
2815. In life, you may feel tired of fighting for the same reason everyday. You may feel that everyone is moving so fast leaving you far behind and you may feel that there is no point of moving on. There's no certainty in life. It's not how fast you get there. It's on how you played the game. Put in mind that at times it is better to be like a turtle who patiently moves and enjoys every step of the way rather than a rabbit who runs so fast and missing every simple single detail in life. Good morning!
2816. Don't say you love someone unless you mean it. Because they might do something crazy like believing it.
2817. Life's little instructions: 1. Never tell a person who's experiencing deep sorrow, "I know how you feel." You don't. 2. Never risk what you can't afford to lose. 3. Once a year, go somewhere you've never been before. 4. Remember that the formula for great love is communication plus respect. 5. When declaring your rights, don't forget your responsibilities. 6. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a stroke of good luck.
2818. Who's talking? During courtship, man talks, woman listens. Once married, wife talks, husband listens. After some years, both husband and wife talk, neighbors listen.
2819. Three contractors were asked to quote for repair of the Whitehouse gate: American contractor: I'll charge $900, $500 for labor, $300 for materials and $100 for me. Mexican: I'll charge $700, $400 for labor, $200 for materials and $100 for me. Filipino: I'll charge $2700. Whitehouse employee: Why so expensive? Filipino: $1000 for me, $1000 for you and $700 for the Mexican to do the job. Whitehouse employee: Hired! When can you start?
2820. Before computers, memory was something you lost with age; an application was for a job; a program was a tv show; a cursor used profanities; a keyboard was a piano; a web was a spider's home; a virus was the flu; a hard drive was a long trip on the road; a mouse pad was where a mouse live and a 3-inch floppy is something a man just hope nobody ever found out.
2821. Seven men where standing naked in a row with erected penises. A passserby saw them and asked, "Are you advertising for condom?" They said, "No, we are posing for 7-Up!"
2822. Husband to hotel manager. Come, hurry, my wife wants to jump out of the window. Manager: What can I do about that, sir? Husband: Idiot! The window won't open!
2823. You know you're getting old if you have become a multi-tasker. You can laugh, cough, fart, and pee all at the same time.
2824. Question. Why are hurricanes normally named after women? Answer: Because when they come, they are wild and wet but when they go, they take your house and car with them.
2825. A rookie pilot was about to land his plane. To ease his tension, he joked the tower controller, "Guess who?" Controller turned off the runway lights and said, "Guess where?"
2827. Life is too short to make it dull and boring. So strive for the best to make it worth living. Dahil makulay ang buhay sa sinabawang gulay! Have a makulay week!
2828. Make cool lie. Make cool lie ang buhay. Make cool lie ang buhay sa sinabawang gulay!
2829. Ang taong bolero, masarap ka text. Ang taong tahimik, makulit sa text. Ang taong two timer, sweet sa text. Ang taong stick to one, matipid sa text. Ang taong pretty, eto, patext-text!
2830. Question. Ano ang pinakamasakit na maramdaman kung matanda na tayo? Sagot: Yung paggising mo, tapos pagtingin mo sa tagiliran mo, matanda din ang iyong katabi! Hahaha!
2831. Husband: Darling, nakakahalata ako na puro made in China ang ipinapakain mo sa akin. Wife: Iniisip ko kasi na kapag namatay ka, hindi na kita ipaeembalsamo!
2832. Class: Ma'am, ang baho po dito, may umutot! Ma'am: Ok, class. Sino man ang umutot, bibigyan ko ng 95 na grade. Pedro: Ma'am ako po. 100 nyo na Ma'am! Natae din kasi ako!
2833. Noon. Anak: Gusto ko na pong magbuntis. Nanay: Hindi pwede anak, kailangang mag-asawa ka muna bago ka magbuntis. Ngayon: Anak: Gusto ko na pong mag-asawa. Nanay: Bakit, buntis ka na ba?
2834. Elementary life: Todo aral, no syota, puro laro. High School life: Konting aral, patagong syota, bawas laro. College life: Walang aral, sabay-sabay syota, iba na ang laro.
2835. Titser: Bakit ka nalate? Bugoy: Nawalan ho kasi ng 500 yung lalaki. Titser: Tinulungan mo sya na hanapin ito? Bugoy: Hindi po. Tinapakan ko hanggang umalis sya.
2836. Question. Bakit masasabing pinakaswerte si Adan sa lahat ng lalake? Answer: Bukod sa nasa paraiso na sya, may asawa pa sya at walang byenan!
2837. Musta ka na po? Miss na po talaga kita. Hope everything is ok. Kapag medyo maluwag ako, bibisita ako dyan ha? Ok lang ba sa iyo? Dyan ka pa rin ba sa mental? Ano nga ba room number mo? Hehehe.
2838. "Sa iyo lang umiikot ang mundo ko." May tao na bang nakapagsabi sa iyo nyan? Puwes, niloloko ka nya! Ano ka? Solar system?
2839. Alam mo, naikwento kita sa puntod ni lola. Sabi ko, ikaw yung pinakamabait kong katext. Aba, akalain mo, sumagot. Hayaan mo apo, dadalawin ko sya ngayong gabi!
2840. Hindi kaya nainsulto si Pacquiao doon sa commercial ng San Miguel? Kasi, di ba, sabi sa kanya ni Morales, "Palakang katulad mo, Manny!"
2841. Jinggoy: Sayang ako na sana ang chairman ng Blue Ribbon committee. Ibinigay pa kay Cayetano. Erap: Hingin mo na lang ang Red Ribbon committee, masarap, laging busog ka pa.
2842. 3:00AM. Lasing kumakatok: Pare, tulong, patulak naman. Pare, naawa: Sige, sandali lang. Nagbihis si pare at lumabas. Saan ka? Lasing: Dito sa swing, patulak naman.
2843. Nagluluto ang mag-ama ng tanghalian. Ama: Ilang sili ang inilagay mo sa karne, anak. Anak: Labing lima, tay. Ama: O sige, gawin mo nang beinte, tapos kainin mo mag-isa, hayop ka!
2844. It hurts so much to be rejected by someone you really love but believe me, it hurts 10x more kung nakahugas ka na nang kamay, tapos, hindi ka pala kasali sa kainan.
2845. Anak: Ma, si kuya, nagbigti po sa banyo! Mama: Ha? Tumakbo patungong CR. Mama: Punyeta ka, huwag kang magbibiro ng ganyan! Anak: Hehehehe. Joke! Sa kwarto po sya nagbigti!
2846. May 7 frogs sa 1 box. Sa box, may 23 pairs na pato and 1 pusa. Ang isang pato ay nakakain ng 56 na suso. Tapos, may 5 langgam. Relax, don't worry. Walang tanong, hi lang!
2847. May isang bata na nagtanong sa tatay nya. Bata: Sino pong mas masarap, si nanay o si Inday? Tatay: Syempre, si Inday. Bata: Hindi naman eh, sabi nung driver natin, si nanay daw eh!
2848. Nangumpisal si Kulas sa mga kasalanang nagawa nya. Pari: Anak, hindi ka patatawarin. Kulas: Ha? Bakit father? Pari: Kasi, may kasalanan ka pa na hindi mo pa binabanggit. Kulas: Ano po yun father? Pari: Ikaw ba ang kumuha ng perang donasyon sa altar? Kulas: Ano po father? Pari: Ikaw ba ang kumuha ng donasyon sa may altar? Kulas: Hindi ko talaga marinig, father. Gusto mo, palit tayo ng pwesto? Nagpalit sila ng pwesto. Pari: Sige, magtanong ka. Kulas: Ikaw ba ang nakabuntis kay Ana na labandera? Pari: Ay, totoo nga, hindi ko nga marinig dito!
2849. Bobokesh ang floweret, jojosok ang reynabels. Chochorva ng chacha, chenes eklavush. - Mga batang bading na naglalaro ng bubuka ang bulaklak.
2850. Man1: Away kami ni misis. Naghistorical sya. Man2: Pare, baka ang ibig mong sabihin ay naghysterical. Man1: Hindi, historical, kasi inungkat lahat ng kasalanan ko.
Contributors:
2801-2815, 2818-2819, 2821-2826, 2830-2845, 2847-2850: Asha (+63917898***7)
2816-2817, 2820, 2829: Eroica
2827, 2846: Anonymous (+63920801***3)
2828: Tekla
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